


flair for overthinking

by redsyub



Series: more than yesterday, less than tomorrow [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Chefs, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Pining, Self-Acceptance, Self-Discovery, Sexuality Crisis, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-23 19:54:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 30,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21325747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redsyub/pseuds/redsyub
Summary: Kim Mingyu was forced to question everything he had ever known after a chance encounter with Wen Junhui.
Relationships: Kim Mingyu/Wen Jun Hui | Jun
Series: more than yesterday, less than tomorrow [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1583539
Comments: 14
Kudos: 105





	flair for overthinking

**Author's Note:**

> as the title suggests, the story's theme revolves around overthinking and it gets very deep. i think the tags pretty much depict the theme but i feel they make this story look too intimidating. even though, it is a happy ending, it's not like unicorns and rainbows. i tried to be as realistic as i could but not make it too sad. it has a good ending, i promise.  
anyway, please enjoy the story!

Mingyu thought his life shouldn’t be as complicated as he made it out to be.

As a Korean man, who could only speak basic phrases of English language till the age of 18, he never thought that he’d be living in Sydney, Australia by the age of 29 and working as a _ sous chef _ in a 5-star hotel. But then again, he imagined his life to be quite different. He imagined that he would still be living in Korea, working as a _ civil servant, _ and in a very stable relationship with a beautiful woman (if not already _married). _

As soon as he finished high school, he enlisted for active duty in the army. It wasn’t easy and there were days when he cried silently, hidden away in the showers, but he managed to survive the tough 21 months. 

During his service, he met a man named _ Lee Seokmin _ who helped him to see the world through a new and optimistic perspective. Lee Seokmin was like a ball of sunshine. Even the senior officers rarely ever bullied him and he was laid off most of the time. It was physically impossible to make or watch the man suffer when his smile literally lit up the surroundings and made all the people adore him. He was a ball of sunshine, indeed.

Seokmin made Mingyu realise that it was okay to follow your dreams. He told Mingyu that if he were to become a civil servant in the future, then he would be praised by his family and friends for a day or week, at most a month. After that nobody would care about his job and well-being and only remember him when his job would be lucrative to their own needs. All of it won’t be of any use then and ultimately shouldn’t matter now. 

But if Mingyu were to follow his dreams, then no matter who criticised him in the beginning or at the end, he would be satisfied and happy by following his passion. _ His job would be his drive to live and not a necessity to survive. _

After that, Mingyu contemplated hundreds, maybe thousands of times about what he wanted. The answer albeit being simple came with a lot of difficulties _-_ _Food._

Mingyu had always loved to cook food. When he was young, he used to follow his mother around the kitchen. It was like he was gathering materials so that he could build his own house in the future. Gradually when he grew older, his experimental dishes drove his mother crazy as she always had to clean up his mess. 

No matter what, people always appreciated his cooking and Mingyu felt elated at the words of all the praises he received. He wanted to make people happy and satiated with his cooking. 

After coming back from his enlistment, he found odd jobs in every type of restaurant to gain some kind of experience. After eight months of scraping around to find a decent job, he found a decent enough job. The owner of the place encouraged Mingyu to get a diploma in culinary arts.

Thus, he researched about the culinary schools, but Korea wasn’t exactly offering great courses. Eventually, he found some schools in different countries and applied to them. He diligently studied English and gave the exam so that he could study abroad. 

He still remembered the day he got the letter from _ Le Cordon Bleu, _ Sydney, Australia. He couldn’t control his emotions and in his clumsiness broke a vase. That was the only day he didn’t get a lecture from his mother for breaking something as she joined him in jumping around the house with glee. 

The 18 months spent in the culinary school were a whirlwind. The main thing to take away from this was that _ Mingyu Kim _ was the top student and graduated with flying colours. He was instantly hired by a Michelin star restaurant as a _ Rotisseur _ which was just a fancy way of saying that he was responsible for preparing and cooking meat. But Mingyu couldn’t complain and worked his way up the kitchen hierarchy. 

It was in his second year after graduating school where he joined the big 4-star hotel, _ Four Points by Sheraton, _ as a _ station chef _ where his life took a massive turn. Suddenly, his life seemed uneventful. Everything dulled out in comparison to one thing. 

One being. 

One man. 

_ Wen Junhui. _

***

Kim Mingyu was conventionally handsome, tall and muscular. It wasn’t very difficult for him to make people turn their heads to check him out. Women poured their hearts out and he recalled having a fan club back in high school.

And, Mingyu loved women. All kinds of women. He didn’t have a particular type. He would give attention to anyone who would show him a little bit of devotion. He thought that he was lucky in this regard because all of his life, when his friends were chasing after girls, he didn’t and yet he had them in his arms. 

He wasn’t a homophobe even though he came from a country where same-sex love wasn’t legal. But he knew that he wasn’t gay. He had never been attracted to or thought of getting physical with a man. He was a typical man who loved boobs and pretty smiles. 

Mingyu was a social bird and loved to bask in the attention. 4 years ago, he couldn’t hold a conversation in English fluently and now he was talking about everything under the sun. But similar-sounding comments were being thrown to his face frequently and he was curious. 

Mingyu Kim had been deemed as the _‘Younger and Taller version of Junhui Wen’ _ by his colleagues.

According to his sources, Junhui Wen was the most talented and exuberant chef the kitchen had in years. He was also a station chef like Mingyu who worked the evening shift. So, Mingyu never crossed paths with him because he worked the morning shift. Apparently, he had a day job that forced him to work only the evening shifts. 

Nevertheless, Mingyu ignored all the gossip and focused on honing his skills. It wasn’t until one fateful evening on a weekday when the owner of the hotel organised a party to celebrate the success of his hotel and the hard work of his employees. Mingyu was a man who loved to dress and it wasn’t a shocker that he was dressed in a sharp light blue dinner suit and matching himself with a silver tie.

Mingyu knew that he looked handsome and women wouldn't be able to look at anybody, but him all night. It had been a while since he had a good fuck and he won’t be disappointed if he could get a woman to return with him to his flat. But then as he was talking to his Executive chef about the new Japanese technique to broil food, two men approached them. He knew the shorter and older man as the sous chef who worked the evening shift. He didn’t know the taller and good looking man accompanying him.

It was on this nice spring night of November that Kim Mingyu finally met Wen Junhui. 

The conversation between the four men was short, mainly involving introductions and a couple of known anecdotes. The thing was that after they all parted away, Mingyu couldn’t help himself, but steal glances at Junhui for the whole night. 

Mingyu couldn’t understand this curiosity that was growing inside of him. He didn’t want to acknowledge anything at the moment. All he could understand was that something had started to form deep inside of him. A cyclone was forming within him and he wasn’t even aware of the disaster waiting to ruin him. 

Safe to say that Mingyu went home alone that night even when four women threw themselves on him. He politely declined them all because his mother had raised a gentleman. 

***

The very next day, he went to work with a purpose - to find out as much as he could about Junhui. He went to the other station chef, Peter, who knew about everyone’s life in the hotel because he was dating the receptionist of the hotel aka the real know-it-all.

Mingyu got straight to the point and asked, “Yo mate, tell me whatever you know about this Jun guy!” 

Peter absorbed his words and looked at him quizzically, “Why the sudden interest?”

“You know, I’ve been hearing so much about our similarities, so I just wanna know if it all checks out.” Mingyu tried to sound as unbothered as he could. 

Peter resumed dicing the lamb and replied, “The only thing that you both have in common is that you both are crazy innovative and pull birds easily. Honestly, you both are extremely different,” He paused then continued. “Plus you’re Korean and he’s Chinese.”

“What’s the last part got to do with our differences?”

“I don’t know! I didn’t want to clutter you both with Asian regionalism and sound racist. I thought differentiating your nationalities would be thoughtful.” 

“Thanks, I guess?” Mingyu replied, but then asked imploringly. “Are you gonna tell me anything about him or nah?”

As Peter was about to reply, their Executive chef chided them to stop talking and get back to work. 

So, it took Mingyu about ten days to understand the enigma that was Wen Junhui. And the following were his observations:

Wen Junhui was a Chinese man who got his degree in culinary arts from a famous school in the USA. He could speak Mandarin, Cantonese and English. His family lived in Shenzhen, China. He was a _ fashion model _ and this was a major reason why he preferred the evening shifts. Mingyu searched for his pictures online (to gain inspiration for his own looks, he convinced himself). He was offered the position of sous chef, but he refused because he didn’t want the added pressure. He was very vocal about his dreams and he wanted to _ travel the world. _

Mingyu was _ obsessed _ with this mystery. He wanted to unravel everything about the man. He wanted to know about his likes and dreams. And the one truth that scared Mingyu to death was that he wanted to touch him and hold him and see how the man looked in all his beautiful, naked glory. He wanted to admire his broad shoulders and slim waist. He wanted to feel his well-built thighs and tall bridge nose. 

First, he thought that maybe it was sexual curiosity. Or maybe he just needed to get laid. So he went rampant on his endeavours for one-night stands. But after the fourth one, Mingyu still couldn’t get Junhui out of his head. Then he went on the approach where he thought befriending the man and getting to know him could appease his thirst. 

‘Befriending Junhui’ as it turns out was a tricky task. He tried to change his shift so that he could work with the man, but was straight down rejected. 

“And have two of my best chefs work together? Impossible! Unless and until you come up with a good reason, you’re working the morning shift, Mingyu Kim.” His Executive chef had bluntly shattered his efforts. 

Mingyu had to be more creative in his endeavours. One night, he was busy contemplating and whining to his flatmate, _ Yoon Jeonghan, _ another Korean man who was working as a Business consultant in Sydney, on their couch while watching TV when he suggested a genius idea. 

“I mean, you’re being a lowkey lunatic trying to get this man. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you try so hard to get a woman. And, you want to meet him so you could learn his secret techniques? You’re weird. I didn’t know chefs could be like this.” Jeonghan told Mingyu. 

The thing was Mingyu couldn’t be completely honest with Jeonghan about his reasons for wanting to meet Junhui. So, he came up with a lame excuse of wanting to be better than the man by knowing his secrets and then trouncing him. Mingyu was naturally a very competitive person so Jeonghan easily bought the bullshit excuse. 

Jeonghan tried to help him. “You could meet him in a place that could be common for both of you. Maybe a coffee shop or gym or some boring cooking class, I don’t know?” 

Mingyu was listening to his suggestion casually while surfing the channels on the TV when something hit him. 

“Gym! You’re right! We both can go to the same gym. I just need to find out which gym he goes to and then buy the membership of that gym. Hyung! You’re a genius!” Mingyu exclaimed while trying to kiss Jeonghan on the cheek which Jeonghan tried to escape from by hitting Mingyu in the stomach. 

It took Mingyu another two days to get the name and address of Junhui’s gym. As it turned out, his gym was closer to Mingyu’s flat than Mingyu’s own gym. Mingyu didn’t join the gym though because its membership was more expensive. He also wanted to make sure he could get Junhui’s usual timings for his workout. He was surprised to know that he also worked out in the morning like Mingyu which made things very convenient for Mingyu. 

The next day, Mingyu jogged to the new gym and joined it even though his subscription for the previous gym hadn’t expired. He did his usual routine and was happy because the gym’s equipment was of better quality and it was emptier, so wait time to use equipment was less. 40 minutes into his workout and he finally saw him enter from the cardio area. 

Junhui was sweating and Mingyu was puzzled because it looked like his skin was glistening liquified gold. He was glowing and Mingyu was blinded. He looked so effortlessly beautiful with his wet and shaggy, brown hair while Mingyu looked like a sweaty dog. For a few seconds, their eyes met and Mingyu thought the whole world stopped with both of them at the centre. Junhui finally walked past him towards the chest press machine and Mingyu had to scurry away towards the washroom to splash his face with water. 

It took another few days for them to have their first proper conversation. Though it wasn’t through Mingyu’s efforts. It was Junhui himself who approached him. 

“Hello! I could be wrong, but I guess we work together in the same kitchen. Though different shifts, right?” His voice matched and at the same time didn’t match his face. It had a hint of deep tenor, yet had the echo of a shrill note. Mingyu thought that angels must sound like him. 

“Ah, yes I guess. I’m Mingyu. We met at the hotel party last month if I remember correctly,” Mingyu tried to sound nonchalant, but he sounded more eager than he would like to admit. 

“You can call me Jun,” Junhui chirped. “You know, I couldn’t help, but notice that you’ve been staring at me with a rather intense glare. I don’t know if you want to kill me or kiss me. But please correct me if I misinterpreted anything.” He said with a smug grin. 

Mingyu choked on his own spit and got extremely perplexed. He couldn’t believe that Wen Junhui could be a _ narcissistic arsehole. _ It was hard to fathom that this was real after his weeks of obsessing over him and fantasising about ruining his innocence.

But at that moment, all Mingyu could manage was a helpless garble of words. “I’m straight.”

“Oh? That’s a shame. You’re exactly the kind of man I would love to have.” Junhui imparted his opinion with a sigh of disappointment. 

Mingyu couldn’t believe the first-ever proper conversation he had with Junhui was about _ him _ being Junhui’s type. He processed that information and couldn’t further believe it. 

“Wait! You’re gay?” Mingyu exclaimed in disbelief.

Junhui went back to pick up the weight and started lifting it while replying casually. “Well, if you want to label things then I’m bisexual. Why? Are you straight and also homophobic?” He asked while raising his right eyebrow and looking him straight in the eyes. 

“No, I’m cool! It’s cool! You’re cool!” Mingyu panicked and started sputtering words. This made Junhui laugh and Mingyu realised that Junhui had the most endearing laugh in this world. 

And this was how Mingyu and Junhui became friends. They started working out together and got to know each other better. They had a hard time meeting outside of the gym because of different shifts, but they somehow made it work. When Mingyu had the day off and Junhui wasn’t busy with his modelling job, Mingyu would visit Junhui’s flat, which was only a few blocks away from Mingyu’s, and they would cook and hang out together. When Junhui had the day off from the kitchen, he would visit Mingyu’s apartment in the evenings and they would watch movies together with Jeonghan. This way Jeonghan and Junhui also became friends. Though Mingyu regretted introducing them because both of them ganged up together to bully Mingyu on a regular basis. 

***

Mingyu was happy. He had forgotten about his inner turmoil as Junhui had become a good friend of his and it was always great to have a close person in a foreign country. It had been three months into their friendship and everything was going great. Junhui lived alone, so he had given the keys to his flat to Mingyu as a token of his trust. 

It was a calm April morning and Mingyu’s birthday had passed very quietly because of work. But he was old enough not to care about it anymore. Mingyu walked towards Junhui’s flat and was excited to show Junhui the new recipe of the lentil curry he had learnt. He unlocked the door and happily skipped inside the flat only to be met by Junhui brewing coffee. The only problem was that only a towel was covering his pelvic area and he was dripping wet which indicated that he came straight to the kitchen after taking a shower. It was a very normal thing to do and Mingyu did it himself. 

The real problem was that the fire which had fizzled out inside Mingyu started spreading rapidly. He wanted to look away, but his eyes were fixed on his well-built body. Junhui wasn’t as muscular as Mingyu. But he was far from being soft and delicate. His muscles were sharp and nerves were protruding from his arms and neck. If Mingyu were to give Junhui one adjective he would use _ ‘ethereal’. _

He finally lifted his gaze towards Junhui’s eyes. Junhui was looking at him quizzically and his eyes were half-lidded. It looked like he was trying to judge Mingyu for something. He finally made his way towards Mingyu. Mingyu backed away on an instant until he hit the dining table. Junhui finally closed the gap. He grabbed his jaw and lowered his chin so that both of them were looking at each other. 

“Remember months ago when you said you were straight? Is that still true?” Junhui spoke in almost a feverish whisper. 

Mingyu couldn’t think straight. He wanted to push away Junhui, but all he could think about was their proximity and how he wanted to touch him and hold him and keep him and make him his forever. _ Jun, Jun, Jun, Jun. _ He did the only thing that made sense to him and held Junhui’s face in both his palms. He looked him in the eyes to gauge his reaction. Was he allowed to do this? Would he be disgusted by him? When he saw no qualms, he reached out and finally closed the gap between their lips.

Mingyu loved kissing. It always gave him something to do while he lost himself to the pleasures of sex. Something to ground him. Women complied very easily to his kisses and it felt good to be the one in _ power. _ But no matter who he kissed, it always felt the same way. He never got addicted to kissing a single woman.

Kissing Junhui was different. Junhui wasn’t soft or small like a woman. He was only a couple inches shorter than Mingyu. Mingyu was a tall man, but Junhui was also classified as a tall man. Junhui was a different kind of soft with a tinge of male ruggedness. His lips weren’t smooth, but Junhui’s plump lips slotted perfectly against his lips. Kissing him felt like a sacred ritual and Mingyu was addicted to _ searching for Nirvana _ through Junhui.

Mingyu dragged his hands down from Junhui’s face and kept caressing his naked skin. First, he touched the sides of his neck then proceeded towards his collar. He held his shoulder while Junhui put both his arms around Mingyu and tangled his fingers in latter's hair. Mingyu dragged his fingers by Junhui’s sides and went lower while bending down till he reached his thighs. He then picked Junhui up and turned them both around so Junhui was sitting on the table and Mingyu was standing in between his legs. Both of them refused to part from each other’s lips. 

Due to the whole position change, Junhui’s towel came undone and Mingyu finally looked at him in all his naked glory. Junhui was panting heavily and his eyes were heavy. His dick was half hard and he was reaching out towards Mingyu so that they could go back to kissing each other. 

At that moment, Mingyu thought that the _ offspring of Aphrodite _ had come to bless him personally. He looked so beautiful and Mingyu wanted to get down on his knees and worship him.

Junhui finally got Mingyu back to kiss him. The latter decided to get back on his plan to worship him and started kissing his jaw and the back of his ear. 

Junhui whispered in Mingyu’s ear, “Ah, so good Mingyu. I want you so bad. Oh yeah, strip for me, baby,” 

Junhui’s words were like a cold bucket thrown over his head and Mingyu immediately backed away as if he was electrocuted by Junhui’s touch. He finally realised that he was kissing a naked man and Mingyu liked to believe that he was very much a straight man. 

In an attempt to run away from the situation, he said. “I-I’ve never done this before.”

“What? Have sex? I have a hard time believing that you’re a virgin Mingyu Kim!” Junhui laughed breathlessly. 

“No!” Mingyu quickly tried to defend himself. “I have never done it w-with a man,” 

“It’s okay. I’m not judging. It’s your phase,” Junhui raised his hands up to prove that he wasn’t trying to mock him while trying to cover his pelvis back with the towel that had fallen. “I’m open to experimenting if you want. We are friends. I won’t mind if you want more,” 

Mingyu wanted to tear his hair out of frustration. “You don’t understand. It’s not just about sex! I just don’t want to fuck you. I want to hold your hands and make you laugh and feed you food and take you out and show you off. But then I’m scared because this is not what I’m supposed to be. You drive me fucking crazy, _ Moon Junhwi!” _

“What did you call me?” Junhui asked like he had been offended greatly. 

“It’s your Korean name. I usually refer to your Korean name in my head,” Mingyu replied meekly while looking at his shoes. 

“What the hell mate? That’s not fair! Now I have to find out your Chinese name, too.” Junhui protested and Mingyu couldn’t believe him. For the first time in months, he finally vocalised his inner turmoil and all Junhui got from it all was his _ Korean name. _ Junhui really was a narcissistic arsehole. But Mingyu was also weak for him and he decided to entertain him. 

“It’s _ Jin Minkui. _ If you’re interested,” Mingyu replied in a small voice. 

“Oh! That’s much better!” Junhui’s eyes finally lit up and Mingyu wanted to kiss him back. “So, you wanna date me, Minkui?”

Mingyu thought about it. How good it would feel to date Junhui. They both were extremely compatible as Mingyu realised during their few months of friendship. They both had common professions so there won’t be any major differences in likes and opinions. Junhui was also the most beautiful creature Mingyu had laid eyes upon and kissing Junhui felt amazing. But what would society think? What about his parents and friends back home? His mother wished to see Mingyu marry a woman and give her grandchildren. Junhui couldn’t even communicate with his parents as neither of them spoke a common language. 

Junhui’s soft voice brought him back from his thoughts. “Stop_ overthinking._ Follow what your heart wants, darling.”

Mingyu finally gave up. He wanted Junhui. He didn’t want to think about the consequences. At least, not for the time being. “Okay, if we are going to do this, we are gonna do it right,”

“What do you mean?” Junhui asked. 

“I refuse to fuck you before taking you out on a proper date,” Mingyu replied seriously. 

This made Junhui crack up and he was guffawing. “Oh my God, Jin Minkui!” He said in between his laughs. “You’re like the biggest puppy I’ve ever seen. Can I make you my pet?”

This made Mingyu laugh too, but he pretended to be offended by swatting at Junhui. “Shut up! Stop teasing me.”

“Okay, okay! Date. When? Now works?” Junhui got down from the table and walked towards his room, leaving Mingyu behind to sit on the dining chair. 

“Don’t you have work?” Mingyu asked. 

“Naah.” He dragged out the ‘a’. 

So, they went on a date. Junhui was an angel because he didn’t get clingy and let Mingyu have his own space in public. It was like any other day when they both hung out. They talked and walked around. The only difference was that Mingyu openly displayed his heart eyes for Junhui and Junhui got bolder with his flirting. 

***

They didn’t get around to any fucking for a few more weeks. Junhui suggested that they should take it slow as it was Mingyu’s first time with a man and he didn’t want to overwhelm Mingyu. Mingyu just fell for him harder during this time. 

It was after their sixth date which was technically the usual movie night at Mingyu’s that Jeonghan finally asked the million-dollar question, “You like Jun?” 

Mingyu’s senses were on alert, but he tried to play it cool. “Of course I do! He’s my good friend. You like him, too!”

“Mingyu, you know what I mean.” Jeonghan beseeched. 

“No! I don’t know what you mean, hyung.” Mingyu replied and tried his best to contain the rising anger. 

“Mingyu, it’s okay. I’m not judging. We are not in South Korea. I just don’t want you to get hurt.” Jeonghan tried to reassure Mingyu.

“No, I don’t wan-” _Huh?_ “Wait, what? You’re not judging?” Mingyu was confused. 

“Not at all. You’re free to love whoever you want. You’re almost gonna get Australian PR and you’ll become a citizen of this country. It’s legal to love here openly,” Jeonghan paused and then proceeded to hold Mingyu’s hand. “I just don’t want you to hurt yourself. I know you have a hard time accepting all this. You’re getting stressed because of all this and this has been going on for months. I just want you to accept yourself before you hurt yourself or Jun-ah.” 

To say Mingyu was at a loss of words would be an understatement. All his life, he had been surrounded by people who believed in heteronormativity. He was taught that anything against that belief was wrong and sick. Hell, even he used to joke about homosexuals back in his childhood. He was so used to the hatred and disgust towards homosexuality and this was the reason why he refused to accept openly that maybe loving Junhui wasn’t a bad thing at all. Suddenly, someone was standing next to him and telling him it was okay to go against the norm in his mother language. Mingyu couldn’t help and shed tears involuntarily. 

And it was like the gates of the dam was finally lifted and Mingyu couldn’t help himself. He finally confessed to Jeonghan. “Hyung, I’m scared. I’m so fucking scared. What if everyone back home hates me? My father might disown me. And, I don’t even know if I’m gay or bisexual or whatever. I’m still not attracted to other men. It’s just him and the fucking scariest part is that my feelings for him might be stronger than ‘like’. I want to give _him_ all, but I don’t know how!” 

Jeonghan hugged Mingyu and let him cry on his shoulders. He tried to calm him down by telling him how brave he was to finally admit it after so long. After what felt like hours to Mingyu, he finally stopped crying. 

Jeonghan gave Mingyu a piece of proper advice. “You should talk to him. And tell him how you really feel. Not just about him, but also about yourself. Junnie is a very smart and considerate man. He would understand if you tell him,” He stepped away from him and patted his head. “I mean, it’s normal how you actually feel. Have you seen Jun? That man can make anybody question their sexuality. He’s way too pretty for his own good.” Jeonghan joked. 

But Mingyu didn’t perceive it as a joke. An ugly green feeling started festering inside him and he warned Jeonghan. “Stay away from him, hyung.” His deep voice actually raised goosebumps on Jeonghan’s arms. 

Jeonghan quickly ran towards his room and tried to lighten the mood. “Last time I checked, I was still straight, Mingyu. But you better not try to take a peek at me while I’m showering!” And, he proceeded to bolt his room shut. 

***

Next time, when Mingyu met Junhui, he had the dreaded conversation just like Jeonghan had advised him to. 

“Are you out to your parents?” Mingyu asked Junhui. 

“No,” Junhui answered dejectedly. Then he went on a very detailed explanation. ”I mean the LGBT scene is better in China than South Korea, I suppose, but that doesn’t mean it’s still widely accepted. My father is very homophobic and I just don’t have the guts to face him. So I just keep my mouth shut about my preferences. It’s not like they are going to come here all the way from China to spy on me. Plus, I don’t like to dwell on the sad realities of my life. I just enjoy life as it comes.” 

To think Junhui faced a similar problem to Mingyu was a shock. He always thought that the always confident Wen Junhui had nothing to hide from the world. But even he had his secrets. And, he knew where to open and close his mouth.

“Do you know what you want for your future? I mean, would you find yourself a woman and settle down with her? Have kids?” Mingyu pressed on.

Junhui tried to gauge what made Mingyu talk about all the difficult things. Then he brushed it off by putting on that usual smug grin. “You’re already dreaming about our future? That’s so cute!” He then got off the couch and headed towards his bedroom. “Anyway, I have to get to the hotel in 15 minutes so talking time is over.” 

“You work the evening shifts though?” Mingyu countered while trying his best to hide his disappointment and pout. 

“Well, they asked me to cover for someone today. So, I’ll be working two shifts.”

And, that was the honest end of their serious conversation. Mingyu watched Junhui leave the flat and he was left all alone to contemplate. That week, Junhui didn’t come to Mingyu’s flat on his day off. He made some lame excuse and Mingyu couldn’t help, but wonder if he did something wrong. 

***

The days that Mingyu didn’t see Junhui felt pointless. He was going crazy with all the distance. He wanted Junhui to tell him everything was alright. He tried calling him to talk and get some answers, but Junhui was a master at avoiding serious discussions. Two weeks after the discussion, Mingyu decided to take matters into his own hands. He knew Junhui had a day off that day and he had made some lame excuse to not come to Mingyu’s flat even when Mingyu asked Jeonghan to talk to him. So Mingyu decided to march to his flat and confront him. He wanted to know why Junhui was avoiding him. 

When he unlocked Junhui’s door and entered his apartment, he realised that Junhui still wasn’t home. Maybe he was out working. So Mingyu decided to make himself at home and wait for Junhui to come home. A couple of hours passed and it was past 7 pm when Junhui finally entered his flat.

Mingyu’s breath was knocked out of him. Junhui was wearing what looked like a sweatshirt and pyjama pants. On top of it, he was wearing a long overcoat. His attire was too casual and comfy. But he didn’t bother removing his makeup and his hair was slicked back from whatever shoot he came from. His face looked like it was sculpted by the gods. His high cheekbones were shimmering, his nose was defined and his eyebrows were perfectly filled in with sharp curves. 

Still, Junhui looked like a deer caught in the headlights. His doe eyes widened and he was surprised to find Mingyu in his flat. “What are you doing here?” He finally asked a little hesitantly. 

“Why the fuck are you avoiding me? What have I done?” Mingyu practically pounced at Junhui crowding him at his own door. 

Instead of being intimidated by Mingyu, Junhui just sagged at his own door. He took a deep breath and looked at Mingyu. His eyes looked so defeated. “I’m tired, Mingyu. You’re clearly self-homophobic and it’s better if I leave you alone. You should forget about me and then you’ll go back to being the straight male that you really want to be. I don’t want to make your life difficult. You’re only 26 years old.” 

His words hit Mingyu like a brick. Junhui didn’t have a problem with him. It was Mingyu who had a problem with himself and Junhui was willingly taking all the blame. Mingyu wanted to cry and throw up, but he also wanted to hold this man and tell him that he deserved the world. 

Instead, Mingyu grabbed Junhui’s hands and pulled him to his own bedroom. He then threw Junhui on his bed and stood by the foot of the bed. Mingyu wanted nothing more than to devour Junhui and let him know that his feelings for him were much stronger than his internal turmoil. 

Junhui went wide-eyed and Mingyu was reminded that, at this moment, Junhui very much resembled a cat. “What are you trying to do?” 

“I want you. Please Junhwi? Let me have you. I’ve waited for almost 7 months,” Mingyu’s voice was trembling and it sounded like he wasn’t sure of his own feelings. He climbed the bed and got over Junhui, hovering over him, caging him in, but not touching him. “I know that I’ve wanted to the first time I saw you. I was just too blind and straight and scared.”

Junhui still pressed further. “Are you ready? Are you completely sure?”

Was Mingyu completely sure? He didn’t know. There was a high possibility that he would panic in the middle and then embarrass himself. What if he couldn’t pleasure Junhui? His ego would bruise heavily if that were to happen. Mingyu started overthinking again. He was brought out of his thoughts when he saw Junhui removing his coat beneath him. He then knocked off his shoes. Mingyu gave him a quizzical look. 

“Ah, I know you’re overthinking and you’re welcome to do so, no pressure! But it’s getting stuffy here and I kind of got hard imagining you pounding into me, so I need to remove my clothes. And probably touch myself to get some relief. I can go do it in the washroom if it’s distracting for you,” Junhui offered in such a casual tone that Mingyu forgot about everything that wasn’t the man beneath him. He chuckled and hid his face between Junhui’s shoulder and neck. 

“You have got to stop teasing me, Jun!” Junhui wound his fingers in Mingyu’s hair and gently massaged his head. Mingyu felt at complete ease wrapped up in the most beautiful man’s arms. He felt safe. It felt good to not be the responsible and heroic person in the relationship. As a man, Mingyu was always expected to take charge and stand up for their partner. With Junhui, it felt more like a two-way stream. It was nice to know that he could give up the reins to Junhui and be spoilt by him if he wanted to. 

All Mingyu could hear was soft breathing beside his head and he suddenly felt the urge to hear the man moan. He shifted his head and started placing open mouth kisses to Junhui’s neck. Junhui’s hands instantly tightened around Mingyu’s hair and he let out a soft moan. He tilted his head further left to give Mingyu more space to work with. 

Mingyu left bruising kisses behind his ears and then made his way to Junhui’s lips. It was like he was ascending to paradise. Their tongues met in this intricate dance and it got messy and he should be disgusted by it, but he was addicted to the taste of Wen Junhui. He wanted _ more, more _ and _ more _ until Junhui was willing to indulge him. 

Junhui’s hands found the way to the front of Mingyu’s shirt and he started unbuttoning it, and there was no precision and the act was very clumsy, something Mingyu wouldn’t expect from Junhui as he was the definition of gracefulness. He still managed to unbutton Mingyu’s shirt and then caressed his palms over Mingyu’s well-defined pecs. Mingyu shuddered into Junhui’s mouth when he took one of Mingyu’s nipples and twisted it between his fingers. He couldn’t control his moans and broke the kiss to make the low guttural sound. Junhui quickly moved to kiss and bite Mingyu’s jaw making his way down. 

Mingyu lost himself in the pleasure that was building deep inside of him. Only two things were running in his thoughts - _ how good he felt _ and _ Wen Junhui. _ It was like Junhui was the cold surface water and the cyclone that had formed inside Mingyu was slowly dissipating. It was getting replaced by a cool sea breeze. Calming and refreshing. 

He didn’t realise that kissing Junhui could be so distracting until Junhui broke the kiss. The realisation hit him that he was lying with his back on the bed and Junhui was straddling him with his knees planted on either side of Mingyu’s body. Junhui removed his sweatshirt and made gestures so that Mingyu would remove his shirt as well. Mingyu wanted to touch Junhui’s naked torso, but his breath was knocked out of him when Junhui started grinding his hips in a circular motion while looking at him with a challenging gaze. 

“How do you want this?” The breathlessness in his voice was so seductive that Mingyu took longer than expected to understand his question. When understanding dawned on him, Mingyu panicked because Junhui wanted to know if he wanted to be the top or bottom. He never imagined being the one on the receiving end and frankly, it made him a little anxious. 

“I want to fuck you.” He found Junhui’s lips and kissed him again. But Junhui broke the kiss again and got off from him. Mingyu thought he said something wrong and immediately grabbed his arm. “Don’t leave me,” He couldn’t believe the desperation in his voice. 

Kim Mingyu was way too deep in his feelings for Wen Junhui. 

“I need to grab the lube and condom, Mingyu.” Junhui bit his lip while speaking. It was clear that he was trying to stop himself from laughing. Mingyu wanted the ground to conjure a hole so that he could fall in it and never come back up again to face the world. 

Junhui finally climbed the bed again and kneeled in front of him, taking his hands. He kissed the back of his knuckles and suddenly sex felt like the most _ sacred ritual _ in this world. Junhui spoke in between the kisses. “Don’t feel embarrassed and ask me anything. This is new for you and I’ll guide you through everything. Remember that _ slow _ is the key. We are taking it very slowly. Talk to me and I’ll tell you everything there is to know.”

Oh, how Mingyu wanted to know everything about Junhui. He would sell his own kidney to get his life encyclopaedia. Only a few hours ago, Mingyu thought that Junhui hated him and now here he was talking to him with so much affection that it made Mingyu cry. It was an affection that came from another man. The man who occupied 80 percent of Mingyu’s thoughts. The man who Mingyu wasn’t supposed to love. The bigger question was who dictated the rule of not loving within the same-sex? Was it the _ society _ or Mingyu _ himself? _

Junhui reached for Mingyu’s belt and unbuckled it, slowly. He asked Mingyu to remove his pants while he removed his own pyjamas. And for the second time in his life, Mingyu saw Junhui in his full naked glory and he felt blessed. 

“Be a good boy and keep your hands to yourself,” Junhui commanded. 

All the voices in his head wanted to argue back. Nobody had ever told him what to do during sex and this felt bizarre. But he wanted to be good for Junhui. So he quietly nodded and watched as Junhui poured a dollop of lube on his fingers, rubbed them together and stretched himself open. The scene in front of Mingyu’s eyes looked _ pornographic - _Junhui kneeling on the bed, fingering himself and moaning so prettily. There were marks blooming on his neck and Junhui never broke eye contact with Mingyu. 

“Do you, ah, like what you see?” Junhui asked. 

Mingyu could watch Junhui pleasuring himself all day. But Mingyu couldn’t ignore his own dick which was now erect. It ached to be touched. When Mingyu brought his hand towards his dick, Junhui made a displeasing sound which clearly meant that he wasn’t allowed to touch himself. So he sat on the bed with his back against the headboard and his legs open and waited. 

“I think this should be enough. You’ve been so good. Mingyu?” Junhui looked at him expectantly. 

“Yes?” Mingyu needed him so badly.

“Enrapture me.” Junhui closed the distance and they kissed. They kissed until Mingyu’s lips felt dry and he needed air. Mingyu flipped them so Junhui was beneath him. And this time, Mingyu worshipped the man below him. 

He saw all the moles that littered his body and the sudden urge to mark them came to him. He left bruising kisses to all his moles. From his forehead to his cheeks. The two on top of his lips that bewitched him on a daily basis. The one on his neck and shoulder. And he kept going until he reached his stomach. 

Unlike a woman, Junhui had a trail running from his navel to the pubic region. His legs were hairy yet his thighs were the most hypnotic thing he had ever seen. Mingyu kissed and bit his inner thigh, but didn’t touch his weeping dick. Junhui moaned and begged prettily. “Please Mingyu, fuck me already. I would do anything for you,” Now that was a _ dangerous _ notion. 

Mingyu finally found the lube and condom laying on the other end of the bed. He rolled the condom on his dick and then palmed himself with lube. “Tell me if it hurts,” 

“Take it slow. Start by just a little and then pull out completely. Then, go a bit further and then pull out again. Keep doing that until you’re fully in, okay?” Mingyu felt lucky that Junhui was here to guide him. He did exactly what Junhui told him to do. It was obvious that it was very painful for Junhui. To ease his pain, Mingyu bent down and wrapped his lips around Junhui’s nipple to distract him from pain. He sucked and bit down on it and Junhui’s back arched to seek pleasure. 

“Move. Move before my dick bursts,” Junhui said meekly. Mingyu thrust slowly at first. He was fascinated with how his dick went inside Junhui and how his body responded to Mingyu’s ministrations. 

“Ah! Deeper. More,” Junhui’s moans reminded Mingyu of _ Sirens _ from _Greek mythology. _ The man was babbling in an unintelligible language to Mingyu which probably was Mandarin. He couldn’t understand anything, but he was enchanted by the sounds and he knew that he was moving towards his metaphorical death. After all, the kid from South Korea had metaphorically died the day he met the man who came from China. 

Mingyu pounded Junhui at a quicker pace because he couldn’t hold it any longer and wanted to get off as fast as he could. This made Junhui scream his name. “Fuck! Ah, Gyu! Yes, deeper! Fuck yes! More Minkui. Kiss me,” And Mingyu wasted no time in kissing him. Though, it was more like breathing into each other while they tried to twist their tongues. Mingyu felt the pressure twisting deep inside his belly and he knew he was close. 

“Jun, are you close?” Mingyu wanted to come after Junhui. The elder took his dick in one hand and started tugging at it. “Come with me, baby! Oh, fuck yes! I’m so close. Fuck! Oh shit, so good! You’re so good to me, love,” And then Junhui was spilling on Mingyu’s stomach. 

Mingyu knew that the face Junhui made in absolute pleasure will haunt him for a very long time. It was enough to make Mingyu come undone. But the thing that really made Mingyu lose it all was one word. 

_ Love. _

The moment he heard the word roll from Junhui’s lips, he couldn’t hold back. He increased his pace only to change it to slow and deep thrusts. _ One. Two. Three. _ And he came inside the condom while riding out his orgasm. 

Mingyu finally understood what Bruno Mars was trying to tell in that _ one song _ he made about sex. 

He pulled out and then removed the condom from his dick. He tied it off at the end and then got up from the bed, finding his way to the washroom where he disposed of the condom in the bin. He then found a towel and wet it under the tap. First, he cleaned himself and then washed the towel again. Then, he walked back to the bedroom to clean Junhui. 

Junhui laid on the bed with a sated expression on his face. “You’re so fucking beautiful that it's almost unfair. Do you have any idea that you drive me fucking crazy? Take responsibility, Moon Junhwi!” Mingyu whined. 

Junhui laughed while Mingyu cleaned him up. “You think I drive you crazy? Minkui, you’re like the definition of _ ‘gorgeous’. _ I haven’t been attracted to a man in so long. Remember the day you told me that you were straight? I got drunk that afternoon and cried to my friend on the phone for the whole day and had to call in sick for work.” Junhui got Mingyu to lay beside him. He laid with his back against Junhui’s chest and their hands intertwined on top of Mingyu’s stomach. It felt good and domestic and Mingyu could live like this forever. 

“I feel lucky in a way that you somehow like me. That’s why I’m willing to be patient with you.” Those words evoked something inside Mingyu. He always thought that he was the only one who was in too deep. But to know that Junhui felt strongly for him too, he felt like he had conquered an _ empire. _

Nobody spoke for a while and Mingyu thought maybe Junhui slept. Junhui spoke again and broke the silence. “It’s my birthday next week. I want you to meet my people. It’s high time that they finally know the man I’m dating.” 

_ Dating. _ They were dating. Mingyu was inexplicably happy. He tried to play it cool because he didn’t want to look so whipped for the man. “Oh? We are dating?” 

“I do hope so. Otherwise why the fuck have I been rejecting people for the past two months?” Junhui said while biting Mingyu’s shoulder. 

“So who are these people?” Mingyu asked out of curiosity. 

“Well, there is _ Hansol. _ Fun fact - we both came to Australia together from America. His father has this company and he wanted someone to handle things here in Australia. So, Hansol is “rich rich”, you know,” Junhui made quote marks with his fingers. 

Mingyu turned his head to look at Junhui. “You left a country for another man? Am I meant to be jealous?” 

Junhui kissed his forehead and reassured him. “Hansol is like family. He didn’t force me and I didn’t have to leave anything behind. I had nothing tying me to America anyway.” 

It turned out, Hansol was no threat to Mingyu. That didn’t mean there was no threat. The real threat was the guy that Junhui had known the longest. 

“Then there is _ Minghao. _ He’s flying in from Beijing. I went to boarding school in Beijing and he joined the school in my second year there. So, let me count,” Junhui mumbled some numbers. “Oh yes! I’ve known him for 11 years. He’s your age actually.”

The information seemed harmless to Mingyu. He even thought that some way or the other, they could get along well because Mingyu comes from a country where same age friendships were valued. 

“What does he do?” Mingyu asked.

“He’s kind of a big deal in China. When I left the country for cooking school, he became a trainee in this entertainment company. Long story short - he’s an idol. He’s coming with a member of his group who is his best friend. His name is Joshua and I lived with him for a year in America before he went to China and became an idol alongside Minghao. He’s also a big deal because Americans are rare in the Chinese entertainment industry. So people naturally want to “stan” him,” A thing Mingyu loved about Junhui was that he was usually a quiet man. But when he did speak, he spoke so quickly that if you weren’t paying attention then you would miss out on a few details.

“Okay. If this Josh is Minghao’s best friend then what are you?” Mingyu naturally thought that Junhui and Minghao would be best friends. Maybe Minghao was the kind of person who had multiple best friends. 

Junhui was quiet for a few seconds. Mingyu turned back again to look at Junhui. There was a fond smile forming on his lips and Mingyu wanted to kiss him again. Though it felt like a bucket of water had been thrown on his head when Junhui finally spoke. “We are _ soulmates.” _

***

Three days later and the word ‘soulmate’ was still echoing in Mingyu’s head. How the fuck was he supposed to stay calm about it? Until three days ago and even now, Mingyu’s understanding of the word equated to people who spend their lives together, true love and all that bullshit. But Junhui assured him that their relationship was absolutely platonic. Also, if Minghao was open to dating, he would only date women. As he was an extremely busy man, he hadn’t gotten into a relationship after graduating high school. 

All of that information meant _nothing_ to Mingyu because Mingyu was also supposed to be into women only. But that clearly wasn’t the case. Mingyu didn’t like to get too honest about his feelings, but he had finally admitted to himself after having sex with Junhui that nothing he ever felt in the past for other people could ever compare to the way he felt about Junhui. 

“Mingyu? Did you make this Bolognese sauce?” His sous chef asked him. Mingyu inspected the sauce and then confirmed that it was indeed him. 

“Taste it and tell me what’s wrong?” He calmly asked him. 

Mingyu tasted the sauce. The sauce was too acidic. He had added more tomatoes than he needed to. “I’m sorry. Give me 3 minutes, I’ll fix it.” 

“You do that, mate!” He reassured Mingyu. “You know, you’re like my best man out here, so for you to make a mistake is definitely a rarity. And, I know humans make mistakes. But if something is bothering you, then you better sort it out of my kitchen. Okay?” Mingyu understood that being the best didn’t mean being _ irreplaceable. _ He answered back positively and got back to fixing the sauce. 

“Trouble in Paradise?” His colleague Peter asked him.

“What do you mean?” Mingyu was confused with his wording of the question. 

“Dude! You aren’t subtle. At least try to hide them hickeys. Did you get a _ girlfriend?” _ Peter’s tone was casual and the question was meant to be harmless. But nothing about the question was harmless to Mingyu. 

Was Mingyu in a relationship? 

_ Yes. _

But was it a girl? 

_ No. _

“Mind. Your. Own. Business.” Mingyu's words were laced with poison. His blood was boiling with rage. He was very close to starting a brawl. But suddenly, Junhui’s laugh echoed in his head. Junhui wouldn’t want to see Mingyu like this. So he calmed down and let go of all his urges. 

Mingyu looked at Peter and then realised what he had done. Peter looked like he had seen a ghost. The thing was Mingyu was big and had muscles. Yes, objectively he was a very handsome man according to everyone’s opinion. But if need be, he could be very intimidating and make anybody pee their pants in fear. 

“I’m sorry. I’m going through things and you shouldn’t become a victim of my wrath,” Mingyu admitted weakly. “Just, I don’t know, let me be for the time being, yeah?” Peter nodded his head vigorously and then ran away from Mingyu’s station. 

That night, Jeonghan, as usual, had to become Mingyu’s personal therapist. “Yah, at least pay me for listening to your problems, you brat!” Jeonghan complained. 

“Aren’t you my friend, hyung?” Mingyu asked Jeonghan in an accusing manner. 

“When you said ‘emergency’, I didn’t expect this Kim Mingyu! I had to cancel my date for what? This?” He gestured towards Mingyu laying down on their couch with a half-eaten chocolate bar dangling from his right hand. 

“Well, all my other close friends live in Korea. And, I haven’t exactly told them that I’m _ in love _ with a man.”

“Does this man even know that you’re in love with him?” 

“No. I’m trying to find the right time. Anyway, Junhui’s birthday is on the 10th and I’m supposed to meet his friends and I’m scared.” Mingyu wasn’t exactly scared. He just didn’t want to see Minghao’s face in fear of saying something to him that may haunt him later. 

He had googled Minghao. _ Xu Minghao. _ He had a list of occupations - singer, rapper, dancer, choreographer, composer, songwriter, painter, photographer, model. Honestly, couldn’t he just stick to one job? And, here he thought that Junhui was crazy to have two jobs. Oh, and Xu Minghao was a looker. Mingyu even watched some of his interviews and shows. Although he had to read the subtitles to understand it, he had a very chill personality. In short - Xu Minghao was a cool person. And, it all made his jealousy double up. How was he to compete with this man? 

“Why am I not invited to this party?” Jeonghan asked.

“Oh, that was because I was supposed to tell you about it, but I forgot.” Mingyu unwrapped the remaining bar and then gobbled it in one go. 

“Well, don’t overthink it. I’m sure his friends won’t eat you. Plus, I’ll be there with you so stop worrying. Now, tell me what I should buy for his present?”

***

On Junhui’s birthday, Mingyu was standing outside Junhui’s main door with Jeonghan by his side. Jeonghan had rung the bell and they were waiting for the door to open, even though Mingyu had the key. It wasn’t Junhui who opened the door. The man didn’t look Asian. Or did he? Mingyu couldn’t figure it out. But objectively speaking, the man was extremely handsome. He didn’t look like an average boy next door, but someone who belonged in those posh and extravagant evening galas. But the main thing was that Mingyu was _ not _ attracted to this man.

“Yo man! Sup? Come on in!” The man beckoned them in.

“I’m Hansol or you can call me Vernon if it’s difficult for you to pronounce the former. Though I was told that you both are Koreans which is cool because I’m half-Korean myself. _ Hello!” _ He said the last word in Korean. 

This prompted Jeonghan to question him in Korean. “So you can speak Korean?” 

“Ah, I’m good at listening, but I can’t speak as fluently. After all, I was born and raised in New York!” Hansol grinned and Mingyu was strangely reminded of Lee Seokmin from the army. 

“But at least I’m better than Joshua. Both his parents are Korean and yet his Korean is abysmal. And, his excuse was that he had to learn Mandarin so he forgot most of his Korean in the process.” Hansol rolled his eyes at the last sentence. 

“Excuse me, where is Junhwi?” Mingyu asked rather impatiently. They both did talk on the phone in the morning, but it was 7 pm now and Mingyu just wanted to wish the man in person. 

“He had some celebratory lunch with his workpeople. You know how the people in the entertainment industry are. They just want an excuse to have someone dish out money so that they could get free food,” He guided them both to sit on the sofa. “Anyway, he should be home any minute now.”

“And what about the other guys?” Bless Jeonghan’s soul for asking the question that Mingyu wanted to know the answer to, but didn’t want to voice it himself. 

“Oh, Josh and Hao would reach here by 8 if the traffic is good. But they both would leave by tomorrow morning. It’s so sad.”

“Do you know them?” Mingyu asked. He was comfortable enough to ask this.

“I know Joshua because he lived with Jun and me for that one year when we were all in the same city, but in different schools,” Hansol went to the minibar to find the corkscrew and then opened the wine cooler to take out a bottle. “Yo could you get me wine glasses? I assume you know where they are.” It was obvious that the request was directed towards Mingyu. 

Mingyu got up to fetch the glasses. Meanwhile, Hansol continued. “This would be the fourth time I’m meeting Minghao. I wouldn’t call myself a very good friend of his. It’s more like he’s satisfied with the fact that I,” he pointed a finger towards himself, “am Jun’s best friend and like I passed all his tests. Anyway, he’s a busy man, but so am I so we both don’t interact much which is fair.” 

Mingyu handed the glasses to Hansol. Hansol asked Mingyu to bend a little with his fingers so that he could whisper in his ear. “Fair warning, you’re also gonna be tested by him tonight, so I hope you pass because Jun likes you a lot and I wouldn’t want to see him get heartbroken.” He stepped away from Mingyu and then took the filled glass to Jeonghan. 

Of course, that bastard would have problems with him, Mingyu thought. Mingyu reminded himself that he didn’t need that man’s validation to be with Junhui. Especially now that Hansol had told him that Junhui liked him a lot. The only validation that mattered was of Junhui and he had already got that one.

Junhui reached home half an hour later. The moment he entered the flat, Mingyu ran towards the door and engulfed him in his embrace. “Happy birthday Junhwi!”

Junhui returned his embrace and tightened his arms around Mingyu’s shoulder. Like he didn’t want to part away from him. “Thank you, love!”

They both stayed like that, wrapped up in each other's arms for a little too long. It wasn’t until Jeonghan cleared his throat that they both separated. 

“I’m so glad you came, Hannie!” Junhui chirped. 

“Of course! I would never miss my friend’s birthday.” Jeonghan said with a fond smile on his face.

“You decided to work overtime on my birthday,” Mingyu commented, who was standing behind Junhui, with his arms wrapped around his stomach and his chest pressed to Junhui’s back. 

“Yeah, I did. Sucks for you.” Jeonghan sang his answer.

“Fuck you!”

“Hey! The only fucking you would do is with me. Now stop fighting and help me with the food and stuff. That also includes you Hansol,” Junhui walked towards the kitchen, but then turned around towards Jeonghan. “You can rest Hannie because you are an angel and I know you must be tired from work.” He even gave him a smile.

“You’re insufferable, hyung!” Mingyu shouted from the kitchen in Korean. 

Everything was going great and dandy. Hansol was an amazing storyteller and he had stories for days. Even Jeonghan was being a decent human being for a change and participated actively in the conversation. Mingyu and Junhui were plastered to each other. Mingyu was drawing patterns on the inside of Junhui’s palms which would indicate to an outsider that they were just being affectionate. But both Mingyu and Junhui knew that Mingyu did this when he was overthinking. And Mingyu was definitely overthinking. He was nervous to meet Minghao. He just wished that Minghao would reach sooner and they could get this over with. 

He felt Junhui squeeze his hand and he looked at him to realise that Junhui was staring at him. He gave him an assuring nod, then went back to give his input on the discussion. Mingyu felt ten times better. 

When Minghao and Joshua finally made their entrance to Junhui’s flat after 9 pm, Mingyu’s first impression was that they both looked very _ human? _ Maybe it was because he had only seen their pictures on the internet which were mostly professional photo shoots and pictures of their idol mode. Currently, both of them wore normal-looking clothes, albeit high fashion and paired their clothes with bucket hats. Mingyu wondered why people would wear those stupid hats. Their faces were stripped of any makeup and they looked like any normal person that Mingyu would meet in daily life. Their looks weren’t average, but also not as godly as he had presumed before. 

The second thing he noticed was that Minghao was not so inconspicuously glaring at him. Not to be overdone by him, he glared back at him. 

“June is not supposed to be cold at all! This is crazy! Anyway, happy birthday Junnie!” Joshua was the first one to break the tense atmosphere. He engulfed Junhui in a hug and they both whispered things to each other. 

“Yo Joshua! Let me introduce you to a man who could be your partner in crime,” And just like that Hansol took Joshua inside the flat. Which left Mingyu alone with Junhui and Minghao in the foyer. Junhui took a deep breath before he spoke to Minghao in Mandarin. Minghao replied back and before he knew it, they were both speaking in Mandarin. This was Mingyu’s first time witnessing Junhui converse with someone in Mandarin and he couldn’t help, but admire his voice when he spoke in his mother tongue. His voice was silvery and modulated. 

They hugged each other at the end and finally faced Mingyu. “Ah Mingyu, this is Minghao and Minghao, Mingyu,” Junhui said while pointing towards Mingyu. 

Minghao finally spoke to Mingyu in broken English. “Hi. My English is very bad. Sorry.” This made Junhui sigh and shake his head. He went inside the flat to join others. “Come on in, you two!”

They all talked to each other and turns out, Mingyu genuinely ended up liking Joshua. He tried his very best to like Minghao, but the man only ever gave one-word answers. But Mingyu excused the man because he couldn’t speak English. 

“Will there be no birthday cake?” Jeonghan asked.

“No, I don’t like to cut cakes on my birthday. It just feels odd. My family never cut cakes on birthdays or anniversaries, so I guess I just got used to it,” Junhui said while chuckling. “Anyway, I want to thank you all for taking out the time from your busy lives to be with me on my birthday. It means a lot to me. You all are very important to me and that also includes you Hannie,” Junhui said while pointing towards Jeonghan. “I hope we can all stay together for a very long time and all of us will be happy and successful in the coming days.” He took his glass from the table and raised it in the air. “Cheers everyone!”

“Cheers!” Everyone said it in chorus. 

“You’ve only been with the guy for a month and you’re talking about a long time? Give me a break!” Minghao hissed in fluent English which was a shock to only Mingyu and Jeonghan in the room. 

“Wasn’t your English supposed to be bad?” Mingyu asked with wide eyes, still trying to recover from the shock of the newly acquired knowledge.

“Minghao likes to pretend that he can’t speak English when he’s feeling lazy or doesn’t want to get himself involved in the arguments that he finds pointless.” Joshua perked up from his place in between Hansol and Jeonghan, clearly intoxicated. 

Sensing the tense environment, Jeonghan looked at Mingyu and tried to convey his intentions through his eyes. Mingyu understood nothing from his facial expression, but he knew that Jeonghan was going to bail. 

“Ah, it’s getting late Junnie. I should take my leave. Thank you for the lovely evening.” Jeonghan gave that angelic smile to Junhui and Mingyu cursed at him for leaving him alone when he clearly promised to stay by his side. 

“I think Vernon and I should also leave.” Joshua got up and gave Hansol the signal to get up. 

“Yeah, of course,” Hansol got up and looked at Jeonghan. “Hey, Jeonghan? Hyung? Am I allowed to call you hyung? Anyway, come to my place. It’s Sunday tomorrow, so I’m sure you don’t have to work. Plus, you and Joshua seem to have great chemistry, so you guys can chill at my place. What do you say?” Hansol proposed very casually, but Mingyu knew that Jeonghan had grown an instant liking towards Joshua just by looking at his face, which was very rare for Jeonghan. After all, it took Mingyu almost two months to get Jeonghan to talk to him even when they were living under the same roof. 

“Yeah, that would be nice,” Jeonghan instantly agreed. “Mingyu, don’t wait up for me! Bye-bye!” 

And just like that, the three men vacated the flat. Mingyu was left with the two Chinese men and he didn’t know if it was a good or bad thing. 

“I’m gonna clean up all the mess. Why don’t you both talk in my room? I promise I won’t eavesdrop.” Junhui started picking up the plates from the coffee table and left Mingyu with Minghao in the living room. 

“Come with me, lover boy,” Minghao commanded and headed towards Junhui’s room. Mingyu took a deep breath and followed him. He guessed there was no escaping from the reality for him. 

Minghao locked the door behind Mingyu and then asked him to make himself comfortable. Mingyu took the simple gesture as a challenge, too and went to lay down in Junhui’s bed. Minghao raised his eyebrows, but then sat at the opposite edge of the bed. 

Neither of them spoke for a few minutes, just looking anywhere, but at each other. Mingyu grew irritated as the minutes passed by and couldn’t take it anymore. “What’s your problem?”

Minghao was taken aback. “Excuse me?”

Mingyu sat up with his back against the headboard. “It is very clear that you don’t like me. And, it is also obvious that your opinion matters to Jun. So what I want to know is why don’t you like me? You don’t even know me.” Mingyu accused Minghao. 

“I know you plenty enough.” Minghao hissed through his teeth, glaring at Mingyu.

Mingyu was confused. He didn’t say anything but looked at Minghao expectantly so that the latter would get the clue to continue. 

“You were apparently straight until you met Junhui_ gē _ which is a load of bullshit to me. The thing is, he isn’t ever going to openly accept this relationship and you’re already confused about your sexuality. Don’t you think it’s better if you both just leave it be while the love is still young and new?” Minghao was a young man, even younger than Mingyu. But at the moment, he looked well beyond his age. He had a tired expression and his words hurt Mingyu like he had been stung by a scorpion.

“What do you mean by him _ never accepting _ it?” 

“Well, he has a reputation and status to maintain and he isn’t going to risk it for romantic endeavours,” Minghao replied.

Mingyu couldn’t relate to this reputation and status. Family issues? Sure. But family doesn’t mean having problems with reputation and status. That was more of a public factor. Then, it hit him. “You mean his modelling career?” 

“Why the fuck would it be related to model-” Minghao then finally understood where Mingyu was coming from. “Wait a minute. Oh no. You don’t know. He didn’t tell you.” 

“Tell me what?” Mingyu was irritated beyond measure.

“Let me get this straight. You do know that Hansol is a very rich heir, right?” Minghao asked. Mingyu confirmed that fact. “And, you know the story of how Joshua met up Jun gē and Hansol at a mixer when he needed a cheap place to stay and got to live rent-free with the two idiots?” Mingyu nodded again. “But do you know the story of how Jun gē and Hansol knew each other even when they both went to different schools and Hansol was still in high school at that time?” Mingyu tried to recall such a memory, but he couldn’t so he shook his head. 

This made Minghao laugh hysterically till there were tears in his eyes. He shook his head and then continued “How would you guys manage to stay together when you don’t even know essential things about each other?” He finally managed to calm down and then look Mingyu straight in the eyes. “Wen Junhui isn’t a celebrity like me. But his name matters. It matters because he is the eldest son of a Chinese multi-millionaire.” _ Millionaire? _ Mingyu started counting the number of zeros in his head to understand the significance of it. Turns out, the significance was huge and Mingyu was left with his jaw hanging. 

“Jun gē’s father and Hansol’s father are business partners. That is how these two fools know each other,” And then Minghao went on a monologue about Junhui’s life.

Junhui was assumed to be the apparent heir of his father's business. So, he was specially brought up as the perfect son, his whole personality curated by professional experts. This is how Mingyu understood why Junhui sometimes seemed too good to be an average human. Though Junhui had big dreams and he refused the key to the empire to pursue his own interests. Naturally, his father mocked Junhui’s interests and told him he would only be allowed to abandon his responsibilities if he were to become some kind of celebrity. His father had meant for him to become an actor or an idol like Minghao, but Junhui chose to become a model which surprisingly satisfied his father. It wasn’t like Junhui had cut ties with his family. His father was more than happy to supply him with funds if need be. In fact, if Junhui were to walk back home and take back his birthright, he would be welcomed with open arms. 

“If I could be with him, I would,” Minghao finally confessed. “I mean, on paper, we are perfect for each other. But being gay could destroy my career in a matter of minutes even though I come from a country which claims to accept same-sex love. That’s how the mentality works in East Asian countries, am I right?” Mingyu knew very well about this mentality. This mentality was the reason why most of the time nowadays, he despised himself.

“You love him?” Mingyu asked quietly. 

“I love him the most in this world,” Minghao admitted with a whisper. That made Mingyu feel absolutely horrible. Of course, Minghao loved Junhui. Mingyu had already doubted that this competition with Minghao was already a lost cause. But he still stood tall and tried to have faith in himself. Now, he knew he had lost the _ war. _

Before he could bolt out of the room and find a secluded place to bawl his eyes out, Minghao continued with his head hung low. “But I’ll never be in love with him,” He finally raised his head and looked at Mingyu. ”Mingyu, I’m not attracted to men. It’ll never happen for us.” 

“The truth is that Junhui would never come out. Not just because of his familial ties, but also because of me. He’s scared that it might affect my career badly if people knew I was associated with a man who liked other men.” Of course, Junhui thought about other people before thinking about himself. He literally avoided Mingyu because he believed that he was to be blamed for Mingyu’s dilemma. 

“I don’t know how to react,” Mingyu confessed honestly. Mingyu had never imagined in his wildest dreams that the reason behind Junhui’s reluctance to be open about his sexuality could be this profound. Mingyu felt guilty for whining about his reasons. He neither had a legacy to carry forward nor had any friends whose livelihood would be jeopardised by his decisions. 

“The bottom line of this story is that he feels strongly about you. And, I fear that he could make rash decisions, not now, but later because of you.” Minghao relayed his concerns. “But you are also confused about your feelings for him. The novelty of your attraction might wear out as time passes by and I don’t ever want to see him cry over your ass. Do you know that he cried over the phone for hours on the day he discovered that you weren’t gay? Imagine how much worse it would hit him when he’ll lose you after having you in his grasp.” 

“He told me about that day, but I didn’t know he literally cried and that you were that friend,” Mingyu replied.

“Oh! He didn’t shed tears. I’ve known him for 11 years and Wen Junhui doesn’t shed tears. But he whines and basically eats my brains till I go brain dead.” Minghao said it bluntly while rolling his eyes.

Mingyu could imagine Junhui whining like a child. He couldn’t help but smile at the image. Junhui was a smart man and put up a front of being careless and childlike as a mechanism to fend off people from his real self. He knew that he looked too pretty and people had a hard time ignoring that fact, so he used that to his advantage. And, people were drawn towards him like a moth to the flame. 

Mingyu finally shed the layer of jealousy and tried to understand Minghao. His personality and his perspective. If they were allowed, then both of them could be very good friends. 

“Minghao?” Mingyu called out.

“Yes?”

“Can we be friends?”

“What? Why would I want to befriend you?” Minghao raised his eyebrows clearly puzzled by what Mingyu wanted. “Are you on to something?” 

“No, I’m not. The thing is I don’t need to prove my feelings to you that I have for Jun. It won’t even matter because you don’t care about it. But I’m going to prove to you that I’m a good person and deserve to be in his life. Even when you don’t like it. Plus, I have a feeling we’d click well.” Mingyu winked at Minghao. 

“Please. I have enough on my platter with Junhui gē. I have a feeling that you would be even more of a pain in the arse.” Minghao deadpanned while getting up and opening the door. 

Mingyu followed him and saw Junhui already passed out on the sofa. His position suggested that he would have a lot of back pain in the morning if he stayed like that for the rest of the night. So he decided to pick him up and throw him on his bed. 

“You see this? Any other person would’ve been nervous that their partner is being grilled. But he just sleeps instead of being anxious over it. At least teach him to take things seriously.” Minghao complained while unlocking his phone to check his notifications. 

“Do you use WeChat?” Minghao asked without looking up from his phone. 

“No. I mostly use Whatsapp and KakaoTalk.”

“Well, I don’t.” 

“You use an iPhone, right?” Mingyu asked while putting on his coat. It was probably for the best if he left the flat. He wanted some alone time to process everything that happened tonight. Plus, he didn’t want to be the audience to Minghao’s farewell in the morning.

“Are you blind? Can’t you see?” Minghao mocked Mingyu. 

Mingyu was usually teased by his friends and he willingly became their victim. But something inside him urged him to hold his ground against Minghao. He chose not to reply to Minghao and just looked at him with an unimpressed expression. 

Minghao waited for Mingyu to say something, anything. “Yeah, iMessage works.” Minghao finally conceded after a few minutes of a staring competition. 

***

After the fateful conversation with Minghao on Junhui’s birthday, Mingyu and Minghao surprisingly became friends for better usage of the word. Their personalities were completely opposite, but they shared similar interests and likes. And, Mingyu felt way better that he finally found someone who would gang up with him to tease Junhui for a change. 

“I hate you both! You think it’s easy being this flawlessly handsome and juggling two jobs at the same time?” Junhui made a V-sign with his thumb and forefinger and brought it to frame his chin. 

“He’s being delusional again, Minghao. What should we do?” Mingyu deadpanned over the phone. 

“I say just ignore him. That would drive him crazy,” Minghao said from the other line. The phone was kept on top of the counter with the speaker on. 

Junhui basked in the attention, so it would definitely drive him crazy if he was being ignored.

“Well, I was going to cook dinner for two, but I don’t know where Junhwi is now. It’s a shame. I miss him. Wish he’d just come back.” Mingyu said loudly so that his voice reached the phone and Minghao giggled at that. Mingyu couldn’t help but smile at his giggles. Minghao could be absolutely adorable when he was not trying to be intimidating. 

Mingyu was busy stirring the vegetables with his back turned towards Junhui. It was unusual for Junhui not to whine about being teased. But he didn’t want to look back and let him have the upper hand, so he did his best at ignoring him. 

He continued talking to Minghao about the new shoes that Nike had released. Mingyu suddenly felt warmth on his back and Junhui had attached his lips on his neck. Of course, Mingyu should’ve known that this man liked to play dirty. Still, he tried to resist his urges and whispered. “I’m cooking. It’s not safe.”

Junhui showed no sign of stopping though, as he turned off the stove. He turned Mingyu around and then sank to his knees. He shoved down Mingyu's track pants all the way to his ankles. There was a glint in Junhui’s eyes that Mingyu could not comprehend. In the background, Minghao, completely unaware of the situation, spoke without a care in the world. 

Junhui palmed Mingyu’s dick through his briefs and Mingyu tried to keep his sounds at bay. It didn’t work because Junhui was an arsehole and he discarded his briefs and held Mingyu’s half-hard cock in his hand. Mingyu moaned and thrust up into Junhui’s hands for some kind of friction.

“And, the thing about the government-” A pause. “Oh fuck! Wait a minute. Are you guys having sex? Don’t ruin my sanctity, I’m hanging up!” Mingyu’s phone showed that the call had been disconnected before the screen shut off automatically. He would apologize to Minghao later, but in his defence, Junhui came on to him. 

Junhui stroked till Mingyu’s dick was full mast and then without any warning, wrapped his lips around Mingyu’s dick. After their first time, they had sex a lot and Mingyu believed that he was familiar with Junhui’s body. It was slow at first, but Mingyu learnt quickly. Mingyu’s eagerness had a lot to do with the power he had over Junhui during sex that was lost usually. He loved to see Junhui crumble in his hands and lose all sense of thinking abilities. He loved when Junhui became an incoherent mess and could only manage bilingual profanities and Mingyu’s name, the latter being the only anchor to his sinking being. 

Junhui hollowed his cheeks and bobbed his head up and down, sucking the life out of Mingyu. Junhui sucked dick like it was an actual _ candy_. His tongue curled around while his lips created a tight suction. He licked his slit after a few laps and proceeded to go all the way down making Mingyu a moaning mess on top of him. He held Mingyu by the back of his thighs, his fingers were dangerously close to his arse. Mingyu closed his eyes and threw his head back in pleasure, feeling the heat of arousal drowning his soul. “Jun-ah. Can I?” He couldn’t formulate the whole question, but he hoped that Junhui understood that he couldn’t hold back any longer and craved to fuck into the heat of his mouth. 

What he got in return was Junhui pulling back with a filthy pop. He lazily stroked his dick with one hand while kneading his arse with the other. “Say Mingyu? Would you please indulge me?” Junhui asked looking up at him with a fervent gaze. His hair was in a disarray, courtesy of Mingyu’s pulling and tangling. Junhui looked like _ sex _ and Mingyu would name a city after him if he asked. Still, he entertained his request and asked, “What do you need?” 

Junhui looked at him with pleading eyes. “I was hoping I could fuck you,” He said without any ill intent. Mingyu never had anyone put their dick up his arse. If Junhui were to ask this a month ago, maybe Mingyu might have panicked and vehemently rejected it. But he felt kind of touched that Junhui let him ease into the physicality of their relationship. Mingyu was still scared, but somehow knowing that Junhui would be there to take care of him appeased his worries. Plus, he wanted to fulfil every single demand of Junhui’s. 

“Aren’t you hungry? The food will spoil if we leave it like that,” Mingyu chuckled. 

“Well, luckily, your boyfriend is also a chef. I’ll cook you something later. Also,” He grabbed Mingyu’s dick and squeezed tightly which made Mingyu almost trip down, but he caught himself using the counter’s edge, “This looks painfully hard. Don’t you want to take care of it first?” Junhui asked innocently, blinking his eyes and Mingyu wanted to throttle him. Instead, he pulled him up and then dragged him towards the bedroom. 

Once inside, he went towards the nightstand and fetched the lube and condom. He practically threw them at Junhui and then lay down on the bed. “Don’t make me wait, Junhwi,” He pleaded. 

“Aren’t you gonna beg prettily for me?” Junhui asked while crawling towards him, opening Mingyu’s legs. 

“I don’t beg.” Mingyu deadpanned.

Junhui snorted. “We’ll see,”

While Junhui grabbed the lube, Mingyu stripped out of his t-shirt. Junhui was in the middle of uncapping and pouring the lube when he saw Mingyu completely naked and dropped the lube. He lay on top of Mingyu and kissed him, their tongues twisting together. Junhui was sucking the inside of Mingyu’s mouth. Mingyu realised that this was Junhui being in his element. Junhui might be better at dicking rather than getting dicked. 

Junhui’s hands had a mind of its own, caressing and pinching Mingyu’s torso. He played with Mingyu’s nipple while sucking the column of Mingyu’s neck and Mingyu couldn’t help, but arch his back, trying to chase the pleasure. 

Mingyu was still painfully hard and was getting impatient. He needed the relief and urged Junhui by holding his hands and guiding them towards his hips. Junhui whispered in his ear, “Good things come to those who wait.”

Mingyu kneed Junhui’s stomach which made Junhui laugh. “You are enjoying this, aren’t you?” It was a rhetorical question. Mingyu knew the arsehole was relishing right now. 

“It is a nice change, don’t you agree?” Junhui removed his clothes in record time and then he flipped Mingyu effortlessly and suddenly he was reminded of the conversation he had with Minghao where Junhui was apparently a 2-time Wushu champion and also the times he witnessed Junhui lifting 60 kgs on the bench press. Mingyu felt the pressure growing in his groin. He was unbelievably turned on by the fact that he was lying with his stomach down and Junhui was on top of him. 

“I’m going to go very slow. Tell me if it hurts a lot.”

Mingyu knew it was going to hurt because it was his first time, yet he wanted to man up and endure the pain. Junhui kissed his shoulders and circled his rim. Mingyu held his breath in anticipation. Junhui prodded the first finger in and Mingyu felt a weird tingling. The intrusion was painful and strange and he tightened up immediately which made Junhui still his finger. 

“Turn your head,” Junhui demanded and when Mingyu turned his head to look at Junhui, he bent down and kissed him. This kiss had less precision but was equally distracting as any of Junhui’s kisses and Junhui resumed moving his fingers in and out. Mingyu squeezed his eyes shut and tried to blindly find Junhui’s other hand. He held his hand while Junhui used his second finger to scissor him. 

If Mingyu tried to distract himself from the pain, he could feel a delightful itch and he couldn’t stop whimpering. It felt so good getting stimulated like this. “You’re doing so good, darling,” Junhui cooed and kept repeating how good Mingyu was and how good he was to Junhui. Mingyu was in too much bliss to feel embarrassed by his choice of words. 

“One more, alright love?” Junhui added the third finger and Mingyu gasped in pain. “Ah! It hurts Jun-ah. Wait!” 

Junhui left sympathetic kisses on his shoulder blade. He waited until Mingyu didn’t feel the burning sensation and told him he could move. 

Junhui slowly moved his fingers in and out, trying to curl his fingers. “Yes! Keep rubbing there, please!” Mingyu begged and Junhui kept rubbing the area around the spot gently, careful not to go rough on him otherwise he’d feel very sore the next day. Mingyu rocked back to Junhui’s fingers, trying to simultaneously find pressure for his aching dick. He was already so close, but he wanted to feel Junhui deep inside him. 

“Junhwi, I’m ready. Please! I need you inside me now!” Junhui removed his fingers and turned Mingyu again so that he was lying on his back. Junhui settled in between his legs and kissed his inner thigh. 

He threw a smug grin towards Mingyu. “You said something along the lines of not begging. I see you’re not a very good liar,” He made his way up, kissing Mingyu’s hipbone, then stomach, reaching up to Mingyu’s chest. He rubbed his palms on his chest and then kissed his nipples. “I really love your chest. It's so defined. Like boobs, don’t you think?” Junhui winked at him and Mingyu hit him on his head. 

“Stop yapping and fuck me!” 

Junhui clicked his tongue. “Is that an order?” 

“Yes!”

Junhui laughed, but ripped the condom out of the packet and rolled it over his dick. He spread the lube on his dick and then lined himself up to Mingyu. “As you wish, my _ Sweet Prince.” _

Mingyu was grateful that Junhui went slow. Just as he had taught Mingyu the first night. He pushed in a little and pulled out, repeating the process. Mingyu groaned in pain and Junhui kissed him to distract him from the pain. “Fuck, it hurts Jun,” Mingyu cried when Junhui pushed in a little too quickly for Mingyu’s pace. 

“I’m sorry, baby. Just a little more,” Junhui said while gritting his teeth. Mingyu saw that Junhui was trying to hold back. When Junhui was completely inside Mingyu, he stayed in, letting Mingyu get used to the fullness. When the burning finally reduced down, Mingyu rocked back experimentally.

“Fuck, are you ready?” Junhui asked holding on to his hips to stop his movement. 

_ Was he ready? _ He had been asking himself that question ever since the very first day when Junhui approached him in the gym on that hot summer morning of December. The problem with Mingyu was that he was always in his head, overthinking, but he never dared to address his problems, so that he could stop considering the endless possibilities. He wanted to give Junhui his everything. His _ money, power and glory _ which was funny because Junhui had all of it in too much abundance already. 

Whenever they went out, people tried to approach them (separately, of course) and Mingyu deflected the people but felt jealousy rising in his gut if he saw Junhui even smile at any other person, even if he was trying to politely decline their advances. He wanted to announce to the whole world that _ Wen Junhui belonged to Kim Mingyu _ and vice versa. But before his declaration, he wanted to tell Junhui that he was _ completely and utterly _ in love with him. He was in love with his mind, body and soul and wanted to devote his whole existence to him. But he was scared. They had only been together for four months. To make things worse, Mingyu thought they weren’t really dating for the first two out of the four. He didn’t want to lay his cards on the table so fast, fearing that it might scare Junhui. 

He looked up at Junhui. He was sweating and was reminded of that day in the gym when he first saw him. How he thought his skin looked like _ liquified gold _ back then. He was glowing then and even now, nothing had changed. He looked so sharp, yet soft at the same time. Junhui usually had a carefree disposure, but Mingyu had never seen a person who was more serious and dedicated to their career than Junhui. He usually ran away from grave discussions and arguments, but his perseverance in daily life was commendable. If Mingyu had to use one word to describe Junhui then he would say he was like an _ oxymoron. _ It fit him so perfectly - _ contradictory aspects that appear in conjunction. _

Was he ready to give Wen Junhui his whole existence? 

Yes, he was.

A lot of fears still spiralled in his head, but Mingyu had never been more sure about anything else in his life than he was about making the decision of wanting Junhui in his life _ forever. _

Mingyu cupped Junhui’s face and made him look straight into his eyes. “I want you to sweep away all the thoughts that are floating inside my head. I only want to concentrate on you, Junhwi.” Junhui took a deep gulp after hearing Mingyu’s request and the latter saw his Adam’s apple bob up and down. His first instinct was to bite it, so he leaned closer and bit on it softly. Junhui moaned above him and started thrusting with shallow movements. 

It was funny how Mingyu had initially thought that the only place where he yielded power over Junhui was the bedroom. And now, here he was at complete mercy of Junhui. Junhui hooked an arm under Mingyu’s thigh, bending him so that the new angle hit him at the spot. “Ah, right there! Oh, fuck!” Mingyu groaned under him. He yanked at Junhui’s neck and kissed him, breathing into each other more than moving their tongues like they usually did while fucking. Mingyu couldn’t deny the pleasure that was spreading through his nerves and saw the desire swirling inside Junhui’s eyes. 

Mingyu thought he was addicted to Junhui’s soft moans and nothing could beat it. But hearing Junhui grunting over him in his deep tone voice rather than the usual breathy voice definitely made Mingyu reconsider his views. 

Mingyu could feel the start of his orgasm creeping upon him and he wrapped his hand around his own length, moving them up and down keenly. He felt his heart stop when his orgasm finally hit him. He couldn’t even voice out a warning to Junhui, his release landing on Junhui’s abs in spurts. Mingyu felt like his soul left his body and he clenched around Junhui’s length because of overstimulation. This made Junhui increase his speed a little too vigorously only to finally slow down to a few intermittent deep thrusts. He groaned besides Mingyu’s ear and then finally flopped over him. 

They both stayed in each other’s arms for a few minutes, breathing, only existing together until Mingyu whined. “Aren’t you going to clean me up?” 

“I thought it was your job?” Junhui blinked airily. 

Mingyu could only glare at him in response. 

Junhui heaved above him and then with great difficulties, he finally managed to get out of the bed. He returned with a washcloth and a new pair of briefs covering his pelvis. 

He cleaned up Mingyu tenderly and then threw the washcloth in the laundry basket across the room. 

“Are you still hungry?” Junhui asked.

“Not really. Water and Tim Tam would suffice.” Mingyu answered in a croaky voice. 

Junhui left the room while Mingyu grabbed his phone from the nightstand to check his notifications and then social media. Minghao had left some threatening messages and warnings. Minghao didn’t want to be a part of Junhui’s sexual escapades even through proxy and he told him to respect that wish. Mingyu replied with a brief apology and fairly put all the blame on Junhui because it was the truth, to begin with. 

Junhui came back with a bottle of water and a couple of Tim Tams. “You were gone for a while,” 

“Aww, did you miss me?” Junhui gave Mingyu a smug grin but handed him the bottle. 

“Minghao wasn’t impressed with your tactics to get my attention.” Mingyu diverted his question, taking a sip out of the bottle.

“Eh, he’ll get over it.” He settled down on the left side of the bed. Mingyu thought that it was very _domestic._ Even though they didn’t live together, they already kind of had their fixed sides of the bed. Mingyu took the right side because it was convenient for him as he was left-handed and naturally Junhui had the opposite side because he was right-handed. Mingyu had started to spend an awful amount of time in Junhui’s flat as they could bask in privacy that they couldn’t afford at Mingyu’s. Also, they didn’t want to disturb Jeonghan at Mingyu’s flat. Jeonghan had his own girlfriend at their place so Mingyu kind of did a favour to both Jeonghan and himself by staying frequently at Junhui’s. 

Junhui was using his phone, sitting with his back against the headboard. He tangled his fingers in Mingyu’s hair. “I had to clean up the kitchen, that is why I took time.” He murmured and then locked his phone, putting it away. 

Junhui looked at him with a fond look and Mingyu felt light-headed. They both munched the chocolate bars and then Junhui took the wrapper from him, crushing it into a ball and then putting it away. Mingyu buried his face in his hips and looped his arms around his abdomen. 

“I have work in the morning. Be honest, I’m gonna have a sore arse tomorrow, right?”

“I’ll be honest with you here, chief. Tomorrow morning is going to be difficult for you. You won’t just have a sore arse to worry about, but ah, your, ah other bodily functions, too. But I promise it will get better with time!” Junhui gave him reassurance, but he had that teasing tone and Mingyu understood what he meant which made him blush furiously and he punched Junhui in the stomach for making fun of him. 

And just like that, they both got lost in each other’s actuality. They both fit each other like two puzzle pieces that came from different boxes. Both of them had a very different life with a different upbringing and social standing coming from different countries. But somehow, their life path was meant to intersect with each other in this country which was far from home. Mingyu didn’t think Sydney was home and knew Junhui had the same opinion. Still, Mingyu found his home away from home in Junhui. He didn’t care what may come tomorrow. He knew that he would be fine if Junhui stood by his side through thick and thin. 

***

Just like that, a few months passed and Mingyu and Junhui became a single entity in their friend’s conversations. Mingyu was practically living with Junhui and Jeonghan made a joke about Mingyu giving him at least 2 months advance notice before legally moving in with Junhui so that he could find a new flatmate to split the rent with. Mingyu purposefully came back to their shared flat every night that week to piss him off. 

Work couldn’t have been better for Mingyu. He was sent to learn from Australia’s finest on a number of occasions and a rumour was spreading in the hotel that hinted at Mingyu’s promotion. Mingyu was just grateful to even be considered for the opportunity. 

On a lazy November night, when Mingyu had the freedom of a day off the next day, both Junhui and Mingyu laid on the sofa and were watching ‘MasterChef Australia’. The scene was too domestic and Mingyu thought that this was exactly how his parents spent their nights at home. _ Were they already behaving like an old married couple? _

Junhui was busy giving his criticism about the skills of the poor amateur chefs. His whole demeanour was animated and he looked so happy. The smile on Junhui’s face was blinding and he couldn’t help, but adore the man he was dating. Something clicked inside Mingyu like a key finally opening the lock. 

He didn’t care that before Junhui, he had only been interested in women. He didn’t care that Junhui was a man. He didn’t care that his family or even Junhui’s family would never accept their relationship. He didn’t care about getting married or having kids. He didn’t care that the world would keep talking about his personal life, even when it wasn’t in their business to do so. 

He only cared about one thing. 

_ He loved Wen Junhui. _

It had been a year since he first saw Junhui and his life had taken a new turn since that night. He had waited for way too long and now Junhui needed to know. There was nothing special about the night or the setting. It was a pretty average day with a mundane, humdrum setting. But they didn’t need a special occasion. 

“And, it’s like all these amateurs try to make such intricate dishes which are way beyond their levels, you know?” Junhui was busy articulating his thoughts. 

“Junhwi?” Mingyu softly called him. 

Junhui gave him an affirmative hum keeping his eyes glued to the TV.

“I’m in love with you.” 

Junhui froze and didn’t turn his head to look at Mingyu. Mingyu was determined and he intertwined their fingers, squeezing a little. “Most ardently.” Mingyu looked at him with a hopeful gleam. 

Junhui closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He then looked up and Mingyu thought he was trying to hold back his tears which didn’t make sense. 

“I have news. Ah, I don’t know how to vocalise it,” Junhui scratched the back of his neck. 

He finally turned towards Mingyu and looked him in the eye. He didn’t look as happy as Mingyu expected him to be. Yet he didn’t comment on it and nodded at Junhui to continue.

“Right. Two months back, a camera director I worked with recommended me to this producer from Network 10 after he learnt that I was a chef. Ah, so I went and had a meeting with these people and turns out, they are creating a new series where a chef would go to different places around the world and learn about all these dishes and you know, showcase it by recreating it,” He paused and bit his lip while choosing his next words. “They were trying to find a young face which could attract the interest of the public.” 

“And, you are a candidate?” Mingyu supplied. 

“I _ was _ a candidate. Not anymore,” Junhui rectified him. 

Mingyu was feeling quite dejected that Junhui had still not replied to his confession. But now, he just felt sad because it was Junhui’s dream to travel the world and cook. And, it was taken away from him. He wanted to console him and do anything that would make him happy again.

Junhui interrupted his thoughts by softly speaking. “Now I have the job,” A pause. “It’s called ‘Around the World with Jun’ and I leave in 10 days. First stop is Indonesia.”

Mingyu couldn’t believe what he was hearing. It felt like someone had plunged their hand inside Mingyu’s chest, grabbed his heart and then pulled it out, compressing it in their hold making the blood ooze out of it like juice out of an orange.

Mingyu stood up from the sofa and looked at Junhui. He wanted to control it, but he couldn’t and it flowed like a waterfall, where the water flows from a great height, harsh and strong. “What the actual fuck? No, seriously! What the fuck, Jun? When the fuck were you planning on telling me about all this?” Mingyu knew he was shouting, but he couldn’t stop it. 

Junhui flinched at his volume. He could only look at his feet, face completely marred with guilt. “I was planning to tell you, but-” Junhui couldn’t finish. 

“Does anyone else know? Am I the only one who knew nothing about it?” 

“Minghao and Hansol are the only ones who know,” Junhui answered slowly. 

“They both knew? And they didn’t tell me? Minghao kept this from me?” Mingyu felt completely betrayed. Not only Junhui had kept such a big secret from him, but Minghao, who he had started to believe was becoming his close friend also kept it from him. More importantly, Junhui _ chose _ to confide about it to Minghao rather than Mingyu. 

“Don’t be mad at them. I asked them to keep it a secret. I made them promise,” Junhui got up and pleaded, trying to hold Mingyu’s hands in his.

Mingyu yanked his hands away and stepped back. “So, what was your grand plan? You were just going to vanish out of the blue in 10 days? Is that right?”

Junhui couldn’t hold back his tears and he was crying. He shook his head quickly and tried to speak. “I was scared. I’m still scared. I don’t know,” 

“You don’t know?” Mingyu scoffed. 

Mingyu was seeing red. A few minutes ago, he was practically willing to kneel in front of this man and now it felt like the ground had fallen out from beneath his feet. _ A volcano had erupted out and the magma was on its way to destroy everything in its vicinity. _ Mingyu wanted to destroy everything.

“I don’t deserve you.”

Mingyu was bewildered and looked at Junhui, his brows knitted together. He wasn’t expecting this. 

“We shouldn’t be together. You need to be a good son and bring a woman back home. Marry her and have kids. We can’t ever get married and I can’t bear you a child,” Junhui confessed dejectedly, tears still streaming down his face. “You shouldn’t love me and I shouldn’t love you back. This is a mistake. We both are making a huge mistake and someone needs to realise it and put a stop to it.” 

Junhui wiped his tears and composed himself. “I don’t want you to regret anything in the future because you don’t deserve to live like this. I can’t see you hating yourself because it breaks my heart. It breaks me to know that you’re suffering for loving me. So, I’m going to put an end to this.”

“Goodbye Mingyu.” Junhui headed towards his front door, grabbed his keys from the bowl placed on the cabinet beside the door and left his own flat leaving Mingyu behind. 

_ Forever. _

***

After the breakup, Mingyu settled back in his old flat. The night when Junhui broke up with him, he ran back to his flat, with his gym duffel bag full of the things he had left at Junhui’s flat. He cried for what felt like hours in Jeonghan’s arms. Jeonghan could only soothe him and console him. But he couldn’t do anything beyond it as he was a common friend.

Mingyu ignored all the attempts of Minghao trying to contact him. He would let his calls ring and the red circle on his message app showed _ 117 _ unread notifications out of which hundred were definitely from Minghao. He got so frustrated that he simply blocked his number. 

Mingyu’s usual chirpy persona was lost and the only thing he could focus on was his work. The news spread like wildfire that Jun, who worked the evening shifts as a station chef at their hotel, had resigned to have his own cooking show. Mingyu tried to block out the noises by chopping the carrots as forcefully as he could with the sharpest knife he could find. 

It was kind of ironic how Junhui left Mingyu, yet his ghost was chasing him every day, at his workplace and around his friends. Junhui had seamlessly woven himself in Mingyu’s life that now his desertion had left a Junhui sized hole in his life. He wanted to cry and lament, but what would be the context of his story? 

_ ‘Hi, I’m Mingyu and I was in love with a man and now he left me to rot with my pathetic feelings.’ _

Yeah, that was never happening because then he would have to answer the questions that he never wanted to entertain. So, he kept his mouth sealed and focused on his work, the only love that had never broken his heart. After all,_ food was love, food was life. _

A few days later, he was searing the chicken livers on a pan one afternoon when the executive chef casually came up to him. “Hello, Mingyu! You’re on training from the day after tomorrow.” 

Mingyu removed the livers from the pan and put it on the plate, only to pass it on to his colleague for further addition to the dish. He then looked back towards his senior and asked. “What training?” Mingyu felt a little offended that his senior thought that he still needed to learn more skills when he was pretty confident with his techniques.

The sous chef poked his head from between the pans that were hanging in front of Mingyu and answered his question. “Training to replace me. I got a job at this other place so someone needs to take my place. Oh, wait!” He walked all the way around the station to stand in front of Mingyu and looked up at him. “I suppose congratulations are in order for your promotion!” He smiled brightly and extended his hands towards Mingyu. 

It took Mingyu a little time to process the information. When it finally hit him, instead of shaking the hand offered to him, he took the man in his embrace. “I’m honoured to have been given this opportunity. Thank you so much!” 

That night, Mingyu went to a bar with all his co-workers for his celebratory dinner. He even invited Jeonghan, so that he could take care of him if he accidentally got too drunk. But in his humble opinion, he needed this after all the things that happened in the past few weeks. He needed to get drunk and forget about the _ man who must not be named_. 

Jeonghan helped himself with only a single round of gin. But Mingyu with the company of a few other people already had 4 shots of Jager Bombs and 2 pints of Carlton Draught. Mingyu, under the influence, felt woozy and wanted to just have fun for a night. He was talking loudly and guffawing, but he didn’t care if he was being a nuisance. He needed this. He needed to forget and if the alcohol helped for a night, so be it.

Jeonghan came to him to stop him from drinking more, telling him that this was self-destruction rather than disremembering. Mingyu shoved him in the shoulder and headed towards the table where few women were sitting. He knew that one of them had been checking Mingyu all night and Mingyu was a generous man. He wanted to make it her lucky night. 

“Hello! Am I interrupting?” Mingyu sounded smooth for someone who had drunk way too much for a short amount of time. 

The woman was beautiful, with wavy long brown hair and flawless caramel skin. She had an alluring aura and Mingyu thought that in another life, he would’ve tried to date a woman like her. But that was another life and now he just wanted to fuck her and forget about things. 

“No, it’s alright. Are you here to join us?” She had a deep and sensual voice, unusual for a woman, but it wasn’t unattractive. A _ breathy voice _ called out his Chinese name inside his head and Mingyu tried to ignore it. 

“I’m terribly sorry to all you ladies. But I’m here to steal this woman from all of you.” Mingyu wanted to cringe at his pathetic attempt at flirting. Was this how he used to pick up women a year ago? 

“I’m Zoe,” Zoe got up from the booth and stood in front of Mingyu. 

“Mingyu. Let me buy you a drink,” Mingyu offered. In all honesty, Mingyu wasn’t interested in having any kind of conversation with this woman. Mingyu was forced to comply with social standards. He took the woman to the bar and they both sat at the stools. After a couple of cocktails, Mingyu’s head was buzzing. He had lost all control over his semblance and he didn’t care if he looked like a literal mess. He did assume he still looked hot enough for the woman to stay with him. 

“Mingyu? Please excuse me, I’m gonna go to the ladies room.” Zoe coyly told Mingyu.

Mingyu just nodded and finished his drink in one go. Then he got up and almost fell down again as the whole place started spinning. He couldn’t differentiate much, could only see lights blurring out. The scene looked like a photograph with too much long exposure. He staggered towards the washroom and entered the one which had pink neon lights around it. 

His luck worked because it was the women’s restroom and Zoe was fixing her makeup in front of the mirror. She looked at Mingyu through the mirror and smirked. “Aren’t you brave enough to walk in here?” 

“Do you want me to walk back?” Mingyu countered.

“No, that would be tragic,” She put her stuff back in her bag and then swiftly turned around. She pounced at him like a cat and connected their lips. 

Mingyu backed her up to the counter and devoured her. It was like he was trying to find something in her. He was trying to find _ someone. _

_ Junhui. Junhui. Junhui. Junhui. Junhui. _

It was like a broken record inside Mingyu’s head. 

***

The next thing he remembered was waking up with the worst headache of his life in his own bedroom. 

Jeonghan was sitting on the chair beside his bed, holding a mug in one hand and using his phone with the other. 

“How did I come back here?” Mingyu croaked out trying to sit straight. But he gave up on that task when his head felt like splitting in two. 

Jeonghan put his phone and mug down on the nearby table and came to Mingyu’s side. He fetched two tablets and a glass of water from his nightstand and handed it to Mingyu. “Swallow and drink.” 

Mingyu took the tablets and drank the water. He realised how parched he was. He finished his glass and asked for more. Jeonghan just handed him the whole bottle. After finishing the whole bottle, Mingyu felt marginally better. He laid back and stared up at the ceiling. 

“A woman came to me last night saying that you were sobbing in the women’s washroom. She said you both were making out and it was going great until you pushed her back and then started crying. She asked you what was wrong and you told her ‘I want my Jun-ah back’. She pronounced it as _ Joanna, _ so I guess she thought it was your ex-girlfriend. I dragged you back in an Uber and for your bloody information, you’re fucking heavy Kim Mingyu and my back is aching.” Jeonghan relayed him the whole story. 

“I can’t remember anything,” Mingyu confessed quietly.

“I wouldn’t be surprised, you drank for the whole neighbourhood! You had a blackout. Even when we got back, it was so difficult to just get you to sleep. You wouldn’t stop crying.” Jeonghan berated him. 

Ah! Of course. He hadn’t had one of those since forever. The last time he had a blackout was back when he had graduated high school. His family had decided to move to Anyang from Seoul after Mingyu completed his studies and he was having a farewell party. But they were young boys and could legally drink so they all drank, not knowing about their drinking capacity. After that, Mingyu had vowed to always be careful with his drinking. 

“You know, I talked to Junnie a few days ago,” Jeonghan said and tried to gauge Mingyu’s reaction. But Mingyu was too tired to give him one. 

“I’m not gonna say if his reasons were right or wrong, but if you think you’re the only one who is absolutely miserable, then think again.” 

“Then why the fuck aren’t we together, hyung? Why did he leave me?” Mingyu couldn’t help but shed tears again. 

Jeonghan went back to sipping his coffee. “You heard his reasons. There is no future for both of you.”

_ Future. _ What kind of future was he supposed to look forward to? He got a promotion and he was one step closer to his dream. He was happy, he really was. But his happiness couldn’t fill the void that was left inside of him. The void that left him dull and tired in this summer heat. 

“I’m gonna call work and tell them I’ll join the evening shift.” Mingyu declared while trying to get up from his bed. 

“I’ll brew you some coffee.” 

***

Sitting on his dining table, with a mug of coffee in front of him, Mingyu felt miserable. He wanted to talk to somebody who would give him unbiased advice. Or at least, someone that would lean more towards providing him sympathy rather than staying neutral. Jeonghan had decided to stay neutral, Hansol had his loyalties towards Junhui and also he wasn’t very close with the man. He had blocked Minghao and he only talked to Joshua on that one night they met. The only people who knew about his relationship with Junhui were not in his options. 

He scrolled through his social media, a mix of his Korean and Australian friends. He came across a picture from Jeon Wonwoo. 

Ah, _ Jeon Wonwoo. _ Memories came rushing back to Mingyu like a flood. Mingyu and Wonwoo had been inseparable from school times until Mingyu came to Sydney. Wonwoo was Mingyu’s senior by a year and had graduated a year earlier than him. Naturally, he enlisted a year earlier than him as well. They weren’t really together for those 3 years, yet somehow managed to stay in contact. Now, Wonwoo was a businessman, leading a beauty brand which came under the biggest beauty and cosmetics conglomerate of South Korea. Wonwoo always had an aptitude for money and he succeeded in making it his job. 

The last time Mingyu talked to Wonwoo was probably last year in July when he called him to give him birthday wishes. Mingyu had a sudden urge to talk to him again. Wonwoo never judged Mingyu in the past and understood him the best. He thought maybe he would provide some kind of help now. Although, he did feel bad that he decided to call him at one of the worst times of his life. 

He searched for Wonwoo’s contact and called his number. If it was 11 am here in Sydney then it would be 9 am in Seoul. Wonwoo was a grown man now, he wouldn’t be sleeping in late like he used to back in his early 20s.

“Hello?” Wonwoo’s deep voice sent shivers down Mingyu’s spine. It had been a long time, after all.

“Hi! Wonwoo? Is this a bad time?” 

“I was about to sleep,” 

“At 9 am in the morning? Don’t you have a job?” Mingyu questioned thoughtlessly. 

“Yah! It is 12 am here in London, you idiot!” Wonwoo bit back.

Mingyu laughed at Wonwoo’s response. No matter how much distance came in between, some bonds couldn't be weakened by the passage of time. “Oh! You live in London now?” 

“No, I’m here for work. I’ll fly back in 2 days.”

Mingyu hummed. It had been so long since he talked to someone from his old life. It felt refreshing for a change. 

“You didn’t even call to wish me this year,” Wonwoo complained. 

“Neither did you.” Mingyu accused him back.

“So what? You were holding a grudge?” Wonwoo laughed back. Mingyu could imagine that nose scrunch on Wonwoo. His heart felt warm for the first time in what felt like forever. 

“Of course I was holding a grudge, arsehole!” 

Wonwoo laughed harder at Mingyu’s response which triggered Mingyu to laugh with him. Mingyu was finally laughing after a long time. Mingyu felt at ease. 

“Is everything alright, Mingyu-yah?” Wonwoo asked suddenly. 

Mingyu’s temporary reprieve shattered. He was reminded of his heartbreak and the ache came back to him in waves. He shed tears, but Wonwoo couldn’t look at him to know that he was hurting. He wanted to tell him everything. Vomit out his feelings to Wonwoo and ask him for help. But Mingyu couldn’t voice out his problems on the phone. He was too scared to do it that way. Mingyu always preferred to have serious conversations in person, so that he could compute the body language of the other person.

He could only manage to tell him one thing. “Wonwoo. I’m in love.” 

“Ah, why the fuck do you sound like someone died? Does _ she _ not love you back or something?” Wonwoo joked about it unknowingly. 

Mingyu couldn’t formulate a response. He started sobbing because that was his automatic response to things he couldn’t put in words nowadays. 

“Mingyu, oh my god, is everything alright? Gyu, please stop crying. Talk to me, I’m here for you,” Wonwoo tried to calm him. “You’ll always have me.” 

Jeonghan came out of his room and asked him if he was okay. Mingyu gave him a thumbs up, but it was useless as his appearance screamed completely opposite of okay. Jeonghan came behind him and held his hand while patting his head. Mingyu could only squeeze back and let his body heat comfort him.

“I want to meet you. Please meet me.” Mingyu implored. 

“Okay. We can do that. Hasn’t it been a long time since you came back home? Come back for the Christmas holidays.” Wonwoo suggested. 

_ Home. _ Three years had passed since he last went to Korea. It was when he finished cooking school. Going back home and seeing his family and friends after a long time would be a logical thing. But Mingyu let fear get the best of him. He knew that in his depressed state, he might blurt out everything in front of his parents because he had never been very good at lying to his mother. His mother, who only wanted the best for Mingyu, worried a lot about him. He didn’t want to add more concerns to her list. He quickly rejected the idea of going home.

“No, not home. Let’s go on holiday. Remember how we planned on going on a holiday when we became financially stable? We should do that!” 

“Are you mad? The prices for the Christmas season are always off the chart. And, booking at this time when Christmas is around the corner? Yeah, that’s not happening.” Wonwoo rejected the idea.

“You’re a fucking millionaire, Wonwoo!” Mingyu sneered.

“That is besides the point!”

“Okay, then January? Let’s go somewhere, please Wonwoo,” Mingyu asked desperately. 

There was silence on the line. Then Mingyu heard Wonwoo take a deep breath. “Okay. You have a place in mind?”

“Somewhere tropical,” Mingyu thought for a moment and Jeonghan supplied from behind him - Mauritius. “Mauritius?” Mingyu echoed back.

“I’ve already been there. Somewhere else,”

“Well, I haven’t!” Mingyu whined. 

“Thailand?” Wonwoo suggested. 

“You want to go to Bangkok?” Mingyu asked.

“I was thinking of Phuket,”

“Wow, that sounds nice,” Mingyu said dreamily.

Wonwoo chuckled. “Are we decided?” 

Mingyu could brood over it and somehow dismiss the plan, but he was too tired to think. 

“Yes.” 

“Okay, I will send you the itinerary when I get back to Seoul. Don’t worry about the money, I’ll pay.” Wonwoo reassured him.

“You’re finally acting like a hyung?” Mingyu joked.

“Yah! Start calling me hyung. We aren’t kids anymore.” 

“Thank you so much, Wonwoo,” Mingyu said with sincerity dripping from him. He was glad that no matter what happened in his life, he would always have Wonwoo. “I’ll let you sleep. We can catch up later.”

“Of course, don’t hesitate to call me. It’s nice to hear your voice Mingyu-yah,” 

Mingyu smiled at that. “Goodnight, Wonwoo hyung.” 

“Have a nice day!” The line ended and Mingyu finally felt some of his pain dissipate from his head. 

“Old friend?” Jeonghan asked. 

“Yeah.”

“You know, I couldn’t help, but hear that he’s a millionaire. Am I the poorest person you know?” Jeonghan asked. 

Mingyu laughed at his question. “You know, if I really think about it, that really might be true, hyung.” Mingyu smiled mischievously, poking his tongue out. 

Jeonghan went wide-eyed at Mingyu’s statement. “Are you serious?” 

“No, I’m not,” Mingyu looked down at his coffee which was now cold. “It doesn’t matter anyway.” 

***

Mingyu was pulled out by Jeonghan to celebrate New Years. He mostly kept to himself and found a lonely table at the corner of the banquet room. He stayed away from alcohol and stuck to coca-cola. When the countdown began, Jeonghan came to find Mingyu with his girlfriend and they both had Mingyu sandwiched between them. Even though he was grateful that he wasn’t alone, he had never felt more lonely in his life.

***

The only thing that changed was the writing of the new year in daily life. Everything else remained the same. Mingyu’s job description was different though and now instead of sticking to a single station, he had to walk around the whole kitchen and oversee every single detail of the dishes that were prepared. By the time Mingyu was done with the day, he was bone-tired and mostly just went straight to his flat. He usually ordered food because he was too tired to function and Jeonghan couldn’t cook to save his life. He then spent his remaining night watching Netflix. 

Mingyu went back to his old gym in the fear that somehow he’d run into Junhui if he saw him in their shared gym. He feared that if he were to see him in person, he would bow down to his feet and beg him to change his mind and take him back. 

So, technically speaking, Kim Mingyu’s pining had not changed. If anything, Junhui’s absence made Mingyu crave him even more. The thing was that Junhui had left him not because he didn’t like him back, but because of the fucking society. This made Mingyu hate society even more. 

Mingyu, who used to be cheerful and social, was now depressed and antisocial. By the end of January, Mingyu finally showed some positive emotions as he was flying out of the country to meet Wonwoo. 

Mingyu was going to meet Wonwoo straight away at the resort in Patong beach. Wonwoo would already reach the resort by the time Mingyu’s fight landed in Phuket. Mingyu was meeting Wonwoo after three years and when he finally reached their shared room, he was left with his jaw hanging. 

The Jeon Wonwoo he remembered used to wear big glasses that used to cover his face. He was a skinny legend who was way too smart for his age. He had hair that was pretty unkempt most of the time and Mingyu used to have the urge to fix it for him on a regular basis. That way more women would be attracted to him. But he still had women flocking towards him, so Mingyu thought that he didn’t need a makeover back then. 

The Jeon Wonwoo that was standing in front of him looked like he walked straight out of a magazine. Not just any magazine, but the ones that featured important people who contributed to society and brought about change in this world. He still wore those big glasses, but they weren’t covering his face anymore. He was neither just skin and bones nor was he bulkier than Mingyu. He was fit with acceptable bulging muscles. And, Mingyu was shocked to see that his clothing sense had changed for the better. Standing there wearing a simple black tee and black jeans, he still managed to look good. Mingyu thought this wasn’t a good time to gay panic over your supposed best friend. 

“Wow, Kim Mingyu! When did you become so hot?” Wonwoo said appreciatively.

“I could say the same for you. Look at you! Rich and hot!” Mingyu said while walking towards him. He took him in his arms and enjoyed the physical touch. 

“Wow! I can’t believe I let you convince me to come here,” Wonwoo complained while walking back to one of the two recliners placed in front of the picture window overlooking the blue sea.

“I did no such thing. You agreed by yourself because you missed me.” 

“Yeah, I did,” Wonwoo had a thing. He had so much love to give to people around him, but he couldn’t ever put it into words. Mingyu used to detest him in the beginning because he thought that Wonwoo was just using him. He realised later that Wonwoo’s love language equated to him watching someone with an unadulterated loving gaze and showering them with gifts which were useful rather than the ones that could only be kept inside a cupboard as a memento. 

“Anyway, I know there is something wrong. Now, I’m physically here Mingyu-yah,” Wonwoo’s face didn’t show any emotion, but his eyes were filled with concern. 

“Let me wash up, then let’s go out for lunch.” Mingyu proposed the plan. 

“It’s 4 pm.”

“I’m not letting your punctuality come between _ Khao Pad _ and me!” Mingyu declared before walking inside the bathroom. 

“Ah, I forgot you are a bloody chef and your life is food.” Mingyu heard Wonwoo whine which made him smile. Mingyu was happy. He hadn’t experienced pleasant feelings for so long. 

***

They both found themselves in a beach shack where both of them caught up to the current affairs of their life. They talked about their mutual friends and their lives and the perks of their jobs. Mingyu learnt that Wonwoo wasn’t seeing anybody. It made him feel better about himself because he wasn’t the only single man on the table. Wonwoo didn’t try to pick up the abandoned conversation from two months back and Mingyu was glad.

***

By 7 pm, they found themselves in a bar and Mingyu decided he had stayed away from alcohol for too long. In fact, alcohol might give him the liquid courage to finally talk to Wonwoo.

They both kept it light with just bottles of beer. Mingyu told himself not to have hard liquor and Wonwoo was satisfied with his decision and joined him. 

“I guess we should finally address the elephant in the room,” Mingyu said, looking at his own hands which were peeling off the label from the bottle. 

“That would be wise as you made me fly out here for it,” Wonwoo said casually, trying to not pressure him much.

“I’m in love.” This line was easy. 

“I am aware.”

The line that followed his previous statement was the hardest thing he ever had to admit to a person he had known for almost 12 years. He took a deep breath and said it, as fast as he could. _ “Iaminlovewithaman.” _

“What?” Obviously, Wonwoo couldn’t grasp his words. 

“With a man, Wonwoo. I am gay. Or bisexual, I guess.” Mingyu finally admitted. Though, the weight didn’t lift off his chest as he still waited for Wonwoo to say something. Anything.

Wonwoo looked at him cautiously, careful not to scare off Mingyu. 

“Wow. I take my words back from two months ago,” Mingyu was left befuddled as he didn’t know what Wonwoo was talking about. 

“Does _ he _not love you back?” 

_Oh._ He was talking about his usage of pronouns. 

“You aren’t disgusted?” Mingyu asked.

Wonwoo looked at him like he had grown two heads. “Why the fuck would I be disgusted? There is absolutely nothing wrong with loving who you want to love, Mingyu-yah.” 

“It is not acceptable in South Korea, though. I would never be able to legally marry him or all the other things.” 

“But you are technically an _ Aussie _ now. Or you will be in a year or so. It’s legal there.” Wonwoo contradicted Mingyu’s statement. 

“That won’t change the fact that I am Korean first. And, I have a family back in Anyang who care way too much about what other people have to say.” 

A deafening silence took over their table before Wonwoo spoke. “Look, it is completely your decision to come out publicly or not. And, ah, thank you for trusting me with this. It has been clearly a troubling matter for you, but I want you to know that it doesn’t make you a lesser man than you were before. And, my opinion and love for you haven’t changed one bit. You are not wrong and it isn’t wrong.” 

Mingyu tried to suck up the tears threatening to spill because he refused to cry in a public place. But the weight had finally lifted and it was easier to breathe again. “I need to clarify that before him, I always thought I was straight. This discovery is pretty new.”

“Really? This man must be a force to be reckoned with if he was the reason behind this epiphany.” Wonwoo gave him a teasing grin. 

For the first time since the breakup, reminiscing about Junhui didn’t make him sad. He seemed more content than he had been for a long time. All the memories and feelings flooded back like an ocean. Kim Mingyu was drowning in devotion. Junhui was the only one for him. It was him or nobody. 

_ Wen Junhui was the love of his life. _

“He is,” Mingyu answered fondly.

“Do I at least get a name if not a picture?”

“Moon Junhwi. Or the name that the whole world knows him with, Wen Junhui.” Mingyu said, trying to roll his tongue to get the proper pronunciation. 

Wonwoo’s expression changed from unbothered to shocked in seconds. Recognition crossed his eyes before he was fumbling for his phone. He finally pointed his phone screen toward Mingyu, practically shoving the phone in Mingyu’s face. “Is this your man?” 

Mingyu was thankful that they were talking in Korean and people around them couldn’t understand them. He looked at his phone and his heart stopped. Since their breakup, Mingyu had tried to avoid anything and everything that was related to Junhui. He didn’t even dare to scroll up his camera roll to find the gazillion selfies that Junhui used to send him. Seeing his face, smiling so brightly, made his knees go weak and his chest constrict. He could only nod dumbly in reply. 

“Oh my god. _ This _ is a lot to unpack.” Wonwoo pointed to his screen. 

Mingyu was surprised that Wonwoo knew about Junhui’s existence. Was Wonwoo an avid lover of the whole modelling world? That was the only possible explanation of how Wonwoo might know of Junhui. He did voice his question. “How do you know him?” _ Why do you know of him? _ Mingyu asked mentally.

“Well, I see that you aren’t aware of the fact that this man has been buzzing on social media. I mean, trending! Worldwide!” Wonwoo informed him while shaking in his chair with excitement. “I’m sure you are aware the man does this cooking show, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Mingyu confirmed apprehensively.

“The show is a bloody hit! Like it was also launched on Netflix globally and now translated episodes are aired the day after the original one. Everyone is in love with the hot and eccentric chef, Mingyu. And, the show only started a month ago. He has taken over the world like a whirlwind.” 

Mingyu couldn’t believe that Junhui found success with his dream this fast. A bittersweet emotion crept up his being. On one hand, he was extremely happy for him and he swelled up with pride on his behalf. On the other hand, all of this was possible because Mingyu was out of his life. It was for the best that they both weren’t together anymore because Junhui could finally fly without anyone holding him back. 

“So I’m not the only one who is in love with him?” Mingyu felt like he was battered by the whole world. 

Wonwoo looked at him sympathetically. “Why aren’t you together anymore, if you don’t mind me asking?” 

“I couldn’t understand it at first either. Then, I had a lot of time to think and now I believe I can sum it up in two words.” 

Wonwoo raised his eyebrow at that. “Two words?”

_ “Filial piety.” _

Wonwoo inhaled deeply, closing his eyes. “I get it,” He opened his eyes and made eye contact. “All the guilt and self-hatred makes sense now.”

Wonwoo signalled towards the waiter to repeat their drinks. “Now that you’ve laid your cards on the table, it’s only fair that I lay them out, too, right?” 

Wonwoo kindly accepted their drinks and proceeded to take a big chug out of his bottle. Mingyu waited for him to continue. When he gave no signal that he was going to speak further, Mingyu tried to fill the silence. “Only if you want to.” 

“I am aromantic.” Wonwoo looked at him expectantly. 

_ Aromantic. _

“So, you can’t love?” Mingyu genuinely asked.

“No, I can. I do. But I can’t fall in love as you can,” Wonwoo teased Mingyu. Wonwoo lazily picked up a peanut from the bowl and moved it in between his thumb and forefinger. “I’m okay with platonic love and even sexual activities. But the moment feelings get involved, you’ll find me running away in the opposite direction. I literally get panic attacks and feel like throwing up.” 

_Oh._ That kind of made sense. As far as Mingyu could remember, Wonwoo had been in relationships before, but they ended as quickly as they began like they barely lasted 10 days. He had gotten a reputation and people were betting on trying to stay with him for the longest time. Wonwoo was the first person to exist in his life who couldn’t have romantic feelings. He wasn’t aware of it much, only knowing it’s basic meaning. He was curious to know more.

“Is it difficult?” 

“I wouldn’t say that it is easy. I’m not trying to sound mean, but with people like you, there is acceptance. Not the kind that you’d like, but people still manage to believe that sexual orientation is a thing. But when it comes to people like me, they think it’s impossible, just a phase, haven’t found the right one, or I’m just a cold-hearted bastard,” He listed while lifting off his fingers to show the count. “I told this to an ex of mine so that I could give her a valid reason for the breakup and she straight up told me to go and consult a psychiatrist!” 

Mingyu listened to Wonwoo attentively. He felt really bad knowing that Wonwoo had his insecurities and that he was told by someone that it could be a mental disorder. Mingyu was pissed at all those people who tried to make Wonwoo doubt his own identity and wanted to punch them in the face. Mingyu had this sudden desire to hold Wonwoo’s hand, fuck the social decency. He squeezed his hand and gave him a reassuring look. “You are perfectly fine. In fact, you are an amazing human and I’m proud of you Jeon Wonwoo.” 

Wonwoo laughed, but he squeezed his fingers back. Mingyu could feel the warmth radiate from Wonwoo’s fingers and his mind was finally at peace after a very long time. 

_ Two people found acceptance and validation in a foreign country. _

“Who else knows?” 

“I told my mother and she was surprisingly very accepting. So, now I’m not expected to get married.” Wonwoo replied. “Oh, and Jihoon also knows.” 

Jihoon. _ Lee Jihoon. _ Mingyu was the biggest fan of Jihoon back in the day. Jihoon was the coolest person he had ever known and Mingyu found him way too adorable as the guy was a little shorter than him (a lot). He got to know Jihoon through Wonwoo as both of them were inseparable and had been close since their kindergarten days. It was nice to know that Wonwoo was still close to him. 

“How is Jihoon hyung?” 

“He’s doing what he loves. Making music for artists who are getting grand prizes. He works as a producer for _ CS Entertainment.” _

“That is amazing!” He was elated to know that he knew a person like Jihoon.

“Yeah, he’s in a lot of demand. The man is booked for days.”

“Aww, I’m happy for Jihoon hyung!” Mingyu was sincerely happy for him.

“You’ll call _him_ hyung, but you refuse to call me one? You ungrateful child!”

They both laughed and walked around the block to check out the city nightlife. After a very long time, Mingyu found back the feeling of a sense of security. He found it with Wonwoo and he was glad. 

***

The next three days, they both enjoyed their time out eating delicious food and doing water sports. Though during nighttime, Wonwoo had to make a lot of business calls because you never really get a leave from a company that you are supposed to own. This made Mingyu get out of their room and take night walks on their resort’s private beach. It was nice to walk alone with the serene noise of the sea waves and the pleasant accompaniment of the sea breeze. Even though Mingyu lived in Sydney, a place famous for its beaches, he rarely ever went out of his way to visit one. Living in Surry Hills meant that the beaches weren’t at a walking distance and Mingyu would prefer to check out new restaurants than go to a beach in his free time.

On their last night, Mingyu was taking a stroll on the beach with his head empty for a change. The ‘no-thinking’ practice that he had adopted here helped him in more ways than he could imagine. He saw Wonwoo walk towards him from the resort entrance and waved at him.

They both walked side by side in silence for a few minutes. “This is nice. I should’ve done this every night,” Wonwoo whined.

“Better late than never.” Mingyu quipped. This earned him an elbow to his side.

“You know, I was waiting for last night to tell you this.” 

“What?” Mingyu turned to look at him. Wonwoo had his head down, so he couldn’t assess his expression.

“You should fight for him. For Jun.” 

“Fight back how?” Mingyu asked in perplexity.

“I think he believes that your love for him is temporary and you can forget him with the passage of time. He might be under the impression that if there is no future in this relationship, then it’s better to stop wasting your time and his time as well. He told you that he would never come out to his parents, right?”

Mingyu nodded. 

“Anyway, he needs to know that he is the love of your life and at the end of the day, your brain may over analyze a lot of things, but as long as he is with you, you’ll be okay.” 

Wonwoo’s words came as a bombshell over Mingyu’s conscience. He stopped walking and he could only look at him with big round eyes. He had told Wonwoo a lot, but he never explicitly mentioned the last part. “How the fuck di-did you know?” Mingyu was hyperventilating and Wonwoo turned around to come back and hold him in his arms. He rubbed his back and tried to calm him.

“It’s written on your face Mingyu-yah. You don’t understand, but when you talk about him, your body betrays you. It always has, as you are a clumsy baby. But your body language screams that he is the love of your life. I’ve known you for a very long time, Mingyu. I can at least read in between the lines when it comes to you. Give me some credit.” Wonwoo told him patiently.

Mingyu could only sway with him, the breeze tickling the back of his neck and soothing the ache inside his bones. Wonwoo was right. He needed to fight for this love. He was blaming Junhui in the back of his mind for being a coward and abandoning him. But how could he blame Junhui, when he couldn’t forgive himself? He had realised a lot of things in the journey of getting to know Wen Junhui, but _ had he accepted himself? _

Jeonghan had accepted him. Junhui’s friends Hansol and Joshua had accepted him. Minghao, after his initial reluctance had accepted him, even if his reluctance was more concerned towards Junhui’s well-being than Mingyu’s orientation. And, finally, Wonwoo had accepted him. What was stopping Mingyu from accepting himself? Who was stopping him?

He turned his head and looked towards the sea. The usual blue massive body of water looked dark and small. Maybe the darkness was limiting his perception, but he could only see what he was shown by the lights from the resort illuminating the sea. He was sick and tired of all the resentment he had against the world. His view of his life was exactly like the view in front of his eyes - _ minute and limited._ He was so busy being pessimistic about everything that he neglected to see the real picture. That picture which when illuminated by the sun takes his breath away. 

Just like the mighty sea, his life was also filled with endless truths. He loved his job even if it tired him out at the end of the day, but it was all worth it at the end. He was surrounded by great and understanding people who accepted him for whatever he identified himself as. He was generally well-liked. His cooking was top class and that showed in his current hierarchy compared to his age. And, just like that, there were so many good things about his life. But the most important one was the man that he was in love with might have a divine status if he wasn’t a deity already. And, the best part of it all was that maybe, _ possibly _ that man reciprocated Mingyu’s devotion. 

It was then that he decided that he was going to get Junhui back.

The only problem with his plan was that he didn’t know where the elder was when his job description’s location was transitory. “I need to see him.”

“Wow, finally, I talked some sense into your head.” Wonwoo gave him an amused look and bit his lip. His nose scrunched up and Mingyu knew he was trying to hold back his laughter. 

“I don’t know where he is.” 

“Then find out. You have mutual friends, right?”

Mutual friends. There was Jeonghan, but he had already established that he was being neutral in this ‘mess’. There was also him. The guy whose contact Mingyu had blocked. Minghao. 

“Let’s go inside. I need to sit down to talk to this one.” Mingyu dragged Wonwoo by his arms towards the resort.

“Who?”

“Do you know anything about C-pop?”

“Not at all.”

“Thank God!” Wonwoo had already shocked Mingyu by knowing about Junhui beforehand. He didn’t know how he would have reacted if he also knew about Minghao. 

***

Back in the room, Wonwoo sat on the recliner and Mingyu walked in front of their beds. He finally tapped the ‘Unblock this Caller’ option. He took a deep breath and then called him. It was 10:30 pm in Phuket so 11:30 pm shouldn’t be late for Minghao if he was in China. The line was ringing and Mingyu’s anxiety came creeping back. He didn’t know what Minghao would say because apparently, he had a lot to say before he blocked his number. 

After the 7th ring, he finally picked his call. “Mingyu? Is that you?” Mingyu could hear the anticipation in Minghao’s voice. 

“Yeah, it’s me.” 

“Oh my god! Fucking hell, Mingyu, I was so worried! I kept asking everyone about you, but nobody gave me an answer and I’ve been trying to free my schedule so that I can come and fly to Sydney to see you, but my company keeps booking me for stuff.” Minghao rambled and it was so weird because Mingyu had never seen Minghao lose his emotions over something. In a funny way, this rambling reminded Mingyu of Junhui. 

“It’s okay Minghao. I’m over it.” Mingyu tried to placate his mood.

“You’re over Junhui gē?” Minghao asked incredulously.

“What the fuck? No! I’m over being mad at you, you idiot!”

“Oh, thank God. If the other thing was true, I was going to make your life a living hell.” Mingyu really felt shivers up his spine. Minghao was good at intimidation.

“Why? Isn’t that what you wanted in the beginning?” 

“That was before I knew about his feelings,” 

Did that mean Junhui loved him still? Mingyu didn’t want to raise false hopes, but he couldn’t help himself.

“A lot has happened Mingyu. Only he can tell you about it.” 

“Where is he?”

“I believe he’ll be flying back to Sydney from Myanmar in two days?”

“From where?”

“Myanmar. It’s in southeast Asia below China.”

Mingyu thought fate could be a funny thing. Here, he was in Thailand enjoying a vacation and having a revelation about himself and the love of his life was in a country that shared a border with Thailand. He was the _protagonist_ of this big comedy movie that was his life. 

“I’ll see him in two days, I guess. I should go now,”

“Mingyu! Just, don’t be a stranger. I really care about you. Talk to me rather than shutting me down.” Minghao said earnestly. 

“Yeah. I’m sorry. I’ll talk to you after all this is fixed. Don’t tell him anything.” Mingyu pleaded.

“The last time one of you said that to me, it almost broke my friendship with the other.” 

Mingyu laughed. “What do you mean by almost? It was broken. I patched it back,” Mingyu huffed. “Nothing is going to break this time, you have my word.” Mingyu didn’t understand where the confidence came from, but he didn’t want to back down. 

“Okay, I won’t open my mouth,” Minghao promised. _ “May the odds be in your favour.” _

“Did you just quote a movie dialogue? I can’t even remember the title!” Mingyu said in disbelief.

“Shut up!” And that was the end of their conversation as Minghao ended the call. 

“Your Australian accent is cute,” Wonwoo commented.

“It’s better than your fake American accent! You don’t even live in the US to justify having that accent.” Mingyu countered. 

“Touché.” Wonwoo conceded. “So, where is he?”

“Myanmar.”

Wonwoo laughed, pointing his finger at him. “It could have been destiny if we went there for the vacation instead. Aww, Mingyu, are you feeling dejected?” Wonwoo cooed.

Mingyu walked towards him and hit him. 

***

The next day, Mingyu and Wonwoo flew back to their respective destinations, promising each other that they would talk more often. Wonwoo also told Mingyu that no matter what decision he ended up making after everything was sorted, he should go and visit his family. 

By night time, he finally reached Sydney and was back in his flat. He unlocked the door to see the flat was empty. He headed inside his room where he stripped his clothes off and washed up. After freshening himself up, he came out to the living room and switched on the TV. He opened the Netflix tab and then searched for Junhui’s show. 

_ It takes courage to be true to yourself. _

Mingyu watched the show and he was enraptured. It was like Junhui was hypnotising people with his brilliant smile and soft voice. And, from an objective point of view, Mingyu was extremely impressed with Junhui’s quick learning abilities and his expertise to add his own flavour to authentic cuisine. No wonder that this show had got so many high ratings. Network 10 made a smart move by making this show global. It looked like they already knew that Wen Junhui would be a global hit. 

Mingyu was on the third episode when Jeonghan came back. He looked at the TV screen, then looked at Mingyu.

“Did I miss something?” Jeonghan asked, disbelief colouring his face. 

And so, Mingyu filled him in. He told him everything that happened in Phuket. 

“I like this Wonwoo guy. This guy was able to talk sense into your brain within 2 days, what I’ve been trying to do for the past 2 months.” 

“Yeah, he’s a very smart man, hyung.” Mingyu agreed.

“So, Mr Mingyu Kim. What’s the plan?” 

“Well, I'll just tell him the truth. You will have to help me though.”

“Okay,” Jeonghan got up from the couch and picked up his things to head back to his room. “I have a question.”

“What?” Mingyu grabbed back the remote so that he could continue watching Junhui’s show.

“If you guys get back together, will you finally move in with him? You know, I told you before to give me a 2-month notice period.”

Mingyu threw the cushion beside him towards Jeonghan.

***

Mingyu was sitting at the dining table, all dressed up ready to bolt out of the flat at Jeonghan’s signal. Junhui was coming back to Sydney and Mingyu was going to confess everything today. It was a ‘now or never’ situation for Mingyu. He did have the keys to Junhui’s flat, but he didn’t want to impose on him as technically, they weren’t together. So, the next best plan was to go and ring the bell and ask for permission to enter Junhui’s flat, a thing Mingyu hadn’t done in a year. 

Mingyu wasn’t very impressed with his timing because Valentine’s Day was around the corner and he didn’t want to seem like a desperate man who didn’t want to be alone on that day. He just didn’t want to stay away from Junhui for the rest of his life. 

Jeonghan finally came out of his room at 9:30 pm. “He sent me a text. He’s inside his flat.” 

Mingyu stood straight and then headed towards their main door. 

“Mingyu?”

Mingyu turned around and Jeonghan gave him his best angelic smile. “You can do it!”

Mingyu nodded back and then left for Junhui’s flat. It was a 15-minute walk from his place. The night was cool enough to calm Mingyu down and not make him sweat too much out of nervousness. He stood outside Junhui’s main door and took a few deep breaths, preparing himself for the worst. He pressed the doorbell and then waited. It felt like he was waiting for his _ judgement day. _

The door opened and he saw him. Junhui looked exhausted, but even then his beauty was shining. Junhui gasped when he saw who had come to visit him.

“Mingyu?”

“Junhwi.”

Junhui just looked at Mingyu for a few moments, opening and closing his mouth like a fish. Finally, he managed to voice out some words. “Do you need anything?”

Yes. He needed Junhui to come back into his life. He needed Junhui to stay by his side for the rest of his life.

“Ah, can I come in?”

Junhui looked like he was contemplating something very difficult. He finally released a deep breath and stood aside to let Mingyu in.

Mingyu breathed in the familiar smell, a mixture of exotic spices and tea. It had only been a little more than 2 months since he had entered this flat, but it seemed way longer to Mingyu. He considered sitting on the sofa, but abandoned that thought and sat on the dining chair. Junhui followed him and took a seat in front of him, a table separating both of them. 

“Do you want anything to drink?” Junhui asked politely. Mingyu hated that Junhui was being so formal with him.

“No, I’m good.” Mingyu wondered if it would be good to just let him know everything. He decided to talk about other things first so that he could ease Junhui into the conversation and probably make him lose this formality that he had somehow adopted.

What should he ask first though? Would asking about his welfare be the right conversation starter? 

“I watched your show. It’s really great.”

“Thank you. I’m glad you think that way,” Junhui said. “How’s your work going?”

“I got promoted,” _ Right after you left me, _ Mingyu wanted to add.

“Wow! You’re a sous chef now? I’m so happy for you. You deserve it!” Junhui smiled at him genuinely and Mingyu believed that he was happy for him. 

They both didn’t say anything after that. The silence was eating Mingyu up. Apparently, this talking about other things wasn’t working and he just wanted to hold the man in his arms again more than anything. 

“Can I say something?” Mingyu asked.

Junhui looked at him apprehensively and nodded. 

“Can I continue from where we ended the conversation abruptly last time?” Junhui understood what last time meant.

_ “Mingyu,"_ Mingyu didn’t know if he was trying to warn him or encourage him from his tone. 

“No, last time I tried to speak, but you interrupted me and spoke so much and then just left. I couldn’t even finish what I wanted to say. So, tonight, I’ll do the speaking and you just listen. After I’m finished, you can throw me out of your flat.” Mingyu stood firmly on his ground. 

Junhui looked like he wanted to say a lot, but he only nodded very weakly and then gestured with his hands to let Mingyu know that he could continue. 

The problem was that Mingyu hadn’t prepared any speech beforehand and now he didn’t know what he wanted to tell him. He went with the things that Wonwoo had told him that Junhui might not know. 

“I am in love with you, Wen Junhui. And, trust me when I tell you this, this love of mine isn’t temporary. You’re unforgettable. I can’t imagine not having you in my life. My life before you was uneventful. Nobody could ever make me feel as strongly as you did. As you do. Nobody has ever occupied my mind as you have. I don’t want to be legally bound to anyone just so that I could make the society satisfied, Jun-ah. None of it would matter in the long run,” Mingyu got up from his chair and walked all the way towards Junhui, kneeling down in front of him and holding his hands. 

“I’ve never opened myself this way with anyone else. The trust that I have always been seeking, I found it in you. My view on things had always been different, but I had to modify it so that people would accept me. But I never had to lie or pretend with you. You always accepted everything with an open mind. Junhwi, please, nothing else matters to me. _ You are the love of my absolute life.” _

Junhui was sobbing, his tears crashing around Mingyu. Mingyu couldn’t take it anymore and took Junhui in his arms. Junhui looped his arms around Mingyu’s shoulders and continued sobbing.

Yes, this was where Mingyu belonged, in the arms of the most beautiful human in the world. _ In Junhui’s arms. _

Mingyu couldn’t hold back his own tears and cried. Both of them crying into each other’s shoulders. 

When Junhui finally calmed down, he leaned back and looked Mingyu in the eyes. “I want to say a million things to you. But first, I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that I made you miserable,” 

Mingyu quickly shook his head to let him know that it didn’t matter, but Junhui grabbed his face and looked at him sternly. “No, be quiet! I’m speaking.” 

Mingyu stared at his lips, dotted with those two moles and the desire that had died down was burning up again. Junhui lifted his chin up so his gaze was lifted back to Junhui’s eyes.

“I went back to Shenzhen in December and I called Minghao there and we talked about what the hell I was doing with my life. My family threw me a celebratory party and a lot of people came. And, I was asked to make a speech as I was this _‘man of the hour’._ This was before the show aired so people didn’t know what I was being celebrated for. I was asked to inform them all about it. But all I could think about was you. How I craved to have you by my side again,” Junhui brushed back Mingyu’s hair gently. 

“So, in front of all these ‘important’ people and my parents, I declared that I’m never getting married. That I’m married to my job and nobody should ever expect me to settle down with someone nice and no aunties should send their child my way. My parents tried to make me reconsider, but I told them I wasn’t taking over the business anyway, so it didn’t matter if I had my own family or not. Also, Fengjun is showing so much interest in business studies. He is the rightful successor,” Junhui kissed Mingyu’s forehead. The touch burned Mingyu’s skin but in a balmy way. 

“What I’m trying to say is that I cut off all obligations that were hindering me to be with you,” Junhui pushed back his chair and kneeled in front of Mingyu. He looked up at Mingyu with so much love twirling in his eyes.

“I’m in love with you. None of this success matters if I don’t have you to share it with. _ I need you to be my home.” _

Mingyu beamed at Junhui and he never knew that happiness could feel this way. It had been raining for way too long in Mingyu’s life and finally, the rain had stopped. Mingyu had forgotten how the sky looked without the dark grey clouds. Now, he could finally look at the sun peeking through those clouds. He felt hopeful like anything was possible now. The sun radiated so brightly, lighting up the darkness surrounding Mingyu. Junhui was his _sun._

_ Love had won. _

They both were laying on the floor because their feelings had tired them out. Junhui laid on top of Mingyu, and they both were content being in each other’s arms. 

“I am yours and you are mine,” Mingyu said.

“Till the day I die.” 

“Why the fuck are you dying first?” 

“Because I am older, duh!”

Mingyu sighed. Their quota for serious conversations was used up. They were both back to their shenanigans. But Mingyu wouldn’t have it any other way. 

***

So, this had been Mingyu’s life story. He turned 29 last month. He had been dating Junhui for 3 years, including the time when they were separated, but they didn’t count it as separate time. Plus, when they finally got back together 2 years back, they didn’t go back to square one. They moved in together and officially became flatmates as it was easier to talk about each other with their respective family, friends and colleagues because flatmates were an important part of one’s life. 

He loved his job and being a sous chef at _ The Marriott, _ the world-renowned 5-star hotel was like a dream come true. His boyfriend was, no surprise, a celebrity chef. His popularity could sometimes be preposterous, but he had learnt to ignore the negativity that came along it and support him through thick and thin. 

He was back in South Korea to attend the marriage of his old school friend, _ Kwon Soonyoung. _ Junhui was back home enjoying his vacation period. The reception was going on and he was sitting at a round table, Wonwoo on one side and Jihoon on Wonwoo’s other side. 

“I can’t believe, out of all of us, Soonyoung is the first one to settle down,” Jihoon protested while nursing a glass of coca-cola in his hand. He couldn’t drink because he had to work after this. The poor man didn’t have a fixed working schedule which was sad, according to Mingyu. 

“Nobody on this table is in a relationship to think of getting married, anyway.” Wonwoo perked up, clearly also not drunk enough.

“Yeah, you aren’t included in that context, Wonwoo.” Jihoon shot back.

“I tried my best to defend you Mingyu.”

“No, it’s okay. Soonyoung hyung could have his own charms,” Mingyu calmly replied to Jihoon. Mingyu had stopped letting things like _ marriage _ and _ relationship status _ bother him a long time ago. 

“I fail to see how anyone can like him. Like him enough to marry him on top of that.” 

“Hey, it’s Soonyoung hyung’s wedding day. Say something nice.” 

_“Something nice.”_ Jihoon deadpanned. Mingyu chuckled at that. It reminded him of Minghao. Minghao’s humour was eerily similar to Jihoon’s humour. 

Jihoon’s phone rang and he glanced at it. He then got up from his chair. “The future of K-pop is calling me. I gotta go.” Jihoon informed them.

“Who?”

_“Dino. _ He’s an idol. He’s good.” Wonwoo supplied Mingyu with the answer.

“Oh! Good for him. I like the other singer you work with,”

“Who?” Wonwoo asked while Jihoon waited for his answer.

_ “Seungkwan?” _

“Oh yeah! He’s my favourite singer. His vocals are hauntingly stable during live shows.” Wonwoo acknowledged.

“I’m obliged to say that my favourite artist is _ The8. _ You know, friendship loyalty,” Mingyu made vague hand gestures. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mingyu! Meet me before you vanish for another decade.” Jihoon pointed his finger at Mingyu.

“We met last year, hyung. I literally had to visit you in your studio because you didn’t want to leave the building.” 

“I said what I said. Bye!” He waved and turned around. 

They both watched him meander through people to reach Soonyoung and talk to him. They hugged each other and then Jihoon left. 

Only Mingyu and Wonwoo were sitting at the current table. “So, how are you feeling?” Wonwoo asked Mingyu.

“I want to marry Junhui,” Mingyu replied without missing a beat.

“Of course, you do,” 

“You know, I was planning to-” 

“No, I don’t want to know.” Wonwoo interrupted.

Mingyu pouted and huffed, then continued. “As I was saying, I’m going to tell my parents that I’m not getting married ever. I’ve been deflecting this marriage conversation for two days and I’ve had enough.” 

“Hmm. That is good.” 

“Yeah. By the way, I got you a gift.”

“Why didn’t you give it to me before?” Wonwoo asked.

“Because I didn’t know I had it with me. I found it in my suitcase today. It’s from Junhwi.” 

“Oh? That’s extremely kind of him.” Wonwoo said. There was a smile on his face. 

Mingyu smirked as he witnessed a shift in Wonwoo's behaviour. “I have it in my car.” 

“Should I go and fetch it?” Wonwoo asked keenly.

“Aren’t you a little too excited?” 

“Who’s excited?” Wonwoo’s expression changed in the blink of an eye and he gave him an uninterested look. 

“It’s funny that my best friend is like the biggest fan of my boyfriend,” Mingyu said in between laughs.

“I’m not his fan!” 

“You like every single one of his posts on Instagram. You haven’t liked a post of mine since last year!” Mingyu complained. 

“Stop whining. You’re not special.”

Mingyu wanted to tease him further. “You know, he was giving me his cookbook to give it to you, but I told him you would already have it, so I didn't bring it with me.” 

“Why would you say no?”

“Don’t you already have it?” Mingyu raised his eyebrow.

“That is beside the point! This one would’ve been special. Yah! Kim Mingyu! You ungrateful child!” Wonwoo glared at him.

“You can’t even cook!” Mingyu argued, finding the conversation incredibly unbelievable.

“There are times when we need things that are useless to us because it makes us happy for no justifiable reason. You won’t understand, it’s very deep.” Wonwoo got up from his chair and Mingyu followed his movement with his eyes. “The party is almost over, let’s find Soonyoung and get out of here. My limit of watching people being in love has been crossed.” 

***

The next day, Mingyu made his parents sit in the family room. He wanted to relay an important decision of his life. Yes, he couldn’t outright say that he liked men and wanted to spend the rest of his life with one. He imagined if he could, then life would be very easy and there won’t be any need of convincing them to stop arranging a marriage for him. But that could only happen in an idealistic world that Mingyu wasn’t a part of.

This was real life. And yes, Mingyu was weak and a coward. He didn’t want to ruin the happiness of his family for standing up for something he strongly believed in. 

_ Sometimes it's better to keep silent than to tell others what you feel because it will only hurt you when you know they can hear you, but they can't understand. _

“What is it, Mingyu? ’Running Man’ is about to come on TV.” His father complained.

“Yes, and I am leaving in an hour. But some things need to be addressed,” Mingyu said while pacing around the room.

“Is this about your marriage again?” His mother spoke up while entering the room from the kitchen. 

“Yes. I don’t want to get married. Like ever.” Mingyu folded his hands and begged. “Not now. Not in the future.”

“Why, son?” Mingyu’s mother didn’t look very happy. 

Mingyu needed a great excuse. But it also needed to be non-accountable. “I’ve seen what marriage did to my friend Vernon. It was horrible and heartbreaking.” He apologized to Hansol in his head. The poor man hadn’t even married once, but Mingyu had already made him a miserable divorcee. 

“That doesn’t mean the same would happen to you!” His mother defended the notion. 

“Why can’t I be married to my job, like Jun is?”

“Your jobs are different!” 

“We are both chefs!” 

“He is a celebrity!” 

Obviously, this wasn’t going well. “It’s my life, you can’t make decisions for me,” Mingyu said meekly, already tired of this conversation and regretting everything in his life. 

“Are you seeing this? Why aren’t you saying something, huh?” Mingyu’s mother grumbled to his father. His father was busy watching TV, so he was irritated that he had to give his input in this conversation.

“The boy doesn’t want to get married. So what? Let him be!” Mingyu’s father said it in a way that meant the discussion was over. 

“You can’t say that! It’s my lifelong dream. I’ve been imagining his wedding day ever since I brought him into this world.” Mingyu’s mother said while looking dreamily at Mingyu. 

“I thought your lifelong dream was to marry me.” Mingyu’s father deadpanned which triggered Mingyu to giggle. 

Mingyu’s mother whined to his father about all the things she had done for him, only to never get back anything in return. Mingyu’s father banished all her whining and looked at Mingyu. “Son, you are 30 years old. It’s your life and do what makes you happy. Knowing that you are happy and safe would keep me satisfied. I’m very proud of you.” His father looked at him with the proudest expression he had ever seen on his face. He used his Korean age.

Mingyu pounced on his father and hugged him. His father hadn't been there for Mingyu in the past because of his job. It made Mingyu feel weirdly distant with his own father. But right now, he couldn’t have been happier to call this man his father. He wanted to confess everything, but he controlled his urges. He was content with this for now. 

***

Mingyu was sitting on his desk in the study room, busy compiling a list of all the ingredients needed for the kitchen so that he can send it to the management. They would accordingly make the orders. It was 10 pm and May was about to end. After living in Sydney for 8 years, Mingyu was used to the cold temperature at this time of the year. 

Junhui entered the room and stood behind him, putting his hand on Mingyu’s shoulder. “Are you busy?”

“Yeah, the head chef is on leave, so I’m left in charge. I’m just making a checklist.” 

“Is it going to take long?” Junhui asked while resting his chin on his shoulder, looking at Mingyu’s work.

“I should be done in the next 10 minutes,” Mingyu basked in the warmth radiating from Junhui. “Do you need anything?”

Junhui hummed and then kissed the back of his ear. He brought his lips to his ear. “I was hoping to do some mind-blowing switch activities.” 

_ Wen Junhui was going to be the death of him. _

“Give me 5 minutes.” He croaked out.

Junhui laughed at his response and then pulled back. Mingyu instantly wanted the warmth back. “Don’t make me wait too long, baby!”

Mingyu quickly finished sending his emails then went out of the room to wash the remaining dishes only to see that Junhui had already tidied up the place. Junhui knew Mingyu had a hard time sleeping if everything wasn’t cleaned and organised. 

He walked to their room and saw Junhui sitting on the settee in front of their window. Weird. Was he up to some role-playing tonight? He took his place beside him and looked at him. 

Junhui looked nervous. What in this world could make him nervous? Mingyu was getting worried. 

“Ah, don’t make that face. I haven’t even said anything.” Junhui admonished him. 

“Then why are you making that face?” 

“It’s my face! I can do whatever I want with it.”

“I’m going to throttle you and throw you out of this window if you don’t tell me what’s going on,” Mingyu warned him.

“How are you going to manage to live with the guilt?” Junhui asked with an amusing expression.

“I’ll jump after you.”

“Don’t talk about death so frivolously!” Junhui scolded him.

“Junhwi.” 

“Fine! Okay, don’t be mad. You always get worked up before even understanding the situation, so stay calm.” 

Mingyu got up and fetched a cushion from the bed and then held it in his hands while sitting back down. Junhui looked at him quizzically. “If I get angry then I’ll just punch the cushion. Safety first.” 

Junhui shook his head and pressed his palm to his face. “Okay, you know how I’m away for so long and then on the phone, I’m always whining and telling you how I wish you were there with me to appreciate the beauty and people and culture and blah blah blah?” Junhui looked at him eagerly and Mingyu nodded in return. 

“Well, one day, my producer overheard our conversation. So he tried to talk to me to pacify me as my mental condition should be in top condition for the shoot,” Junhui got up and started pacing around their bedroom. 

“He asked me about your profession and I told him you are a chef. Then he asked me if you were an extrovert and I told him that it can be irritating how much of an outgoing arsehole you are,” Mingyu was already getting ready to defend himself, but nobody could interrupt Junhui when he was in the zone and in the middle of rambling. 

“He asked me if you are good looking and I told him that you are the sexiest person alive,” Mingyu blushed at the gratuitous compliment. 

“We both kept going back and forth and then I sent him your professional hotel videos and one thing led to another and you know,” Mingyu couldn’t understand, for the life of his, what Junhui was hinting at. 

“Just get to the point, Jun-ah.”

Junhui started speaking in Mandarin and it was clear he was panicking.

“Junhwi, in English please.”

“Please work with me! I beg you. Don’t be mad.” Junhui kowtowed in front of him and Mingyu was bewildered. 

“Work with you?” Mingyu asked carefully, trying his best to keep calm by crushing the cushion. 

Junhui lifted his head and spoke. “Yeah, two men travelling around the world and cooking food. I’ll get to travel the world with the love of my life and do things that we both love! Isn’t that amazing?” Junhui’s face was contorted with anxiety, but his eyes were twinkling at the plan.

“I’ll join your show?” 

“No, it will be rebranded,” Junhui got up and sat beside Mingyu. “Are you mad?”

Mingyu currently couldn’t fathom what he was feeling. 

“I fail to understand why you make these life-changing decisions without ever letting me know anything about it in the first place?” Mingyu asked instead. 

“Because serious discussions are hard and taxing.”

Unbelievable. Fear of discussions shouldn’t lead to a change in someone’s life path. “Am I already hired?” 

“Yeah,” Junhui replied weakly while looking at his feet. 

“How is that even possible? I have never met these people once in my life.” Mingyu was baffled with the situation, to say the least. 

“I told them you were extremely busy. Plus, I am good at convincing people. And, my producer knows that we are partners, so he also helped with pulling the strings because I told him that you were aware of it and he believed me.” Junhui explained. 

“What if I say no?”

“Oh? Um, I guess I would tell them that you changed your mind,” Junhui said dejectedly and Mingyu felt bad that Junhui was getting upset over this which was ridiculous because this man was clearly manipulating him and he was letting himself get manipulated even when he was completely aware of it. 

Mingyu contemplated the opportunity - Travelling around the world with Junhui. Cooking together. Exploring new places. New adventures and experiences with Junhui. _ Having his name next to his immortalised in digital media. _

They could never get married. But this was the next best thing after marriage. He wanted to be mad at Junhui for doing things on his own again. He couldn’t help but love him more. If Mingyu was thinking that this was ‘Marriage without Legal Formalities’ then Junhui must also think that way. And, God knows what kind of things he did to convince those people to hire Mingyu without having them ever meet Mingyu. 

Junhui did all of it so that they can be together without any inhibition. 

“Okay,” Mingyu said softly.

“Okay?” Junhui sounded confused which was very funny because he looked like a lost cat. 

“Let’s do this.”

Junhui jumped up from the floor, planted his knees on either side of Mingyu and straddled his lap, only to kiss him breathless. 

“I love you. I love you so much, Mingyu. You are the best thing to ever happen to me.” Junhui chanted in between the kisses. 

“You are awfully happy.” Mingyu teased him back.

“Of course! We are going to be unofficial husbands now! Fuck the society!” 

“We are going to be coworkers again.” Mingyu amended his words.

“Fuck. The. Society.” Junhui emphasised each word and Mingyu knew there was no point in arguing any further.

“So do I need to meet them to draft a formal contract?” Mingyu asked.

Junhui jumped back from his lap and went to his dresser to fetch a file. “It’s here. Just sign it and it’ll be official.” 

Mingyu could only sigh back. He read the document. “What the hell are these numbers?” Mingyu asked dubiously.

“Your salary, duh.” 

“This is a lot! This is an almost 80% increase from my current salary. This is ridiculous!” Mingyu couldn’t believe what he was seeing.

“Well, this show is a big deal. This is just initial numbers. It would increase soon if you give them what they want. Plus, this isn’t even 10% of my own salary.” Junhui said carelessly. 

“Shut up, millionaire!” 

“Okay! So, come with me to the office tomorrow.” 

“Oh, to finalise things?” Mingyu asked.

“Yeah, to finalise the contract and make them hire you.” 

Hire? Mingyu was confused. Wasn’t he already hired according to what Junhui said a few minutes ago?

“Then, what is this?” He asked, raising the file in the air.

“That’s the provisional contract.” Junhui snatched the file from his hands so that he could put it away. “You can’t back out now, you already said yes.” 

_Mingyu was speechless. _

“What? You thought you were already hired? That’s so naive! This is a very big company. There are proper procedures to hire people. One of them includes the presence of the person to be hired. Don’t ever leave me Mingyu, the world will eat you up.” Junhui rebuked Mingyu. 

Junhui was a master trickster and it was not the world that Mingyu feared, but the power that this man yielded. 

“Stay away from me, you devil!” Mingyu said while running away from the room. 

“Aww, Mingyu, don’t be mad! I love you. Let’s talk about love!” 

“Fuck you!”

“I was hoping that you would! Mingyu! Come back!” 

***

In the middle of September, Junhui and Mingyu laid on the bed of a hotel in Barcelona. They had a very tiring day exploring and shooting. They didn’t have the energy to do anything other than cuddle each other. So, this was how Mingyu found himself spooning Junhui. They were both lost in each other’s presence that Mingyu didn’t notice his phone going off. It was only the next morning that he saw a bunch of text messages from Wonwoo. It went something like this - 

_ ‘the fuck am I hearing?’ _

_ ‘when were you gonna tell me, you idiot?’ _

_ ‘when you said you wanted your names together, I didn’t think you’d take such real measures’ _

_ ‘where are you?’ _

_ ‘okay but the name? it’s so bad. “Jun and Mingyu take over the world”?’ _

_ ‘it’s like the title of a porno’ _

_ ‘yah!’ _

_ ‘kim mingyu!’ _

_ ‘fuck you for not informing me before’ _

_ ‘and fuck you for taking away my favourite cooking show’ _

_ ‘now i will have to see your face’ _

_ ‘i didn’t ask for this’ _

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! i might write a story from jun's point of view in distant future. his feelings are intense as well if not as complicated as mingyu's.  
kudos and comments are very much appreciated! you can talk to me on twitter [@redsyub](https://twitter.com/redsyub)


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